The Young Family

A New Year

2012-01-01T22:12:00.000-08:00

I'm happy to be sick & stuck at home this New Years day. It may sound silly but it seems to be the only thing that stops me. And I needed it. What a perfect day to be still. A perfect day to soak in & embrace the inspiration around me. My soundtrack Bethel Live. My camera Canon 5D Mark ii. My husband Josh. My kids Gavin, Grace, & Bo. My God in my heart & speaking still. I'm aware that this time is short and it counts. I often dream of how I can serve Him & how I can do more. I'm concerned with what impact i'm having. But more and more I realize He wants me, not what I can do for Him. He wants me still in His presence. Had I been moving today I might have missed the joy in the silliness, tears, drippy noses, laughter, shaved mustache, gorgeous blond curls, dirty feet & constant conversation with my God. Happy New Year indeed! I eagerly look forward to what joys my God will bring & reveal in 2012.

One Thirst lyrics
Bethel Live

You say to us seek Your face
Our hearts reply Your face we seek
Come teach us Lord reveal Your ways
Anoint us for the greater things

We have gathered with one thirst and hunger
We're here to drink of glory and wonder
Here to cry out come and fill this place

Our single wish, our sole desire
To gaze upon Your beauty God
We will not rest not will we cease
Till with our eyes Your face we see

We wait for You to
Come and show Your glory here today

We wait for You

Hallelujah come

Fat

2011-10-11T09:39:00.000-07:00

Lord, I love what is familiar...I love what I know. I want to stay in what I know & what is familiar. But you call! You call, so loudly, so clearly, so desperately that I am intrigued. I question why you call. I am fat with knowledge, fat with your word & oh so comfortable right here in what is familiar and what I know...especially how I know you. But I hear you & your getting louder & its unsettling. Why are you so desperate to get my attention? I'm curious, more than intrigued. So, I fatten up and this time questioning, am I missing something?
And there it is on the page, the very page I have read 100 times. But now listening with ears that want to hear.
You call me to go!! to move!! to walk!! to bring!! to run!! to follow!! Wait...I don't want to hear anymore.
But I've heard & now must make a choice.
But... I am comforted by what is familiar, by what I know. Maybe I'll just pretend I didn't hear Him or overthink it to the point of confusion and then convince myself that I must really understand it all before I move & risk moving in the wrong direction. Days pass. I disobey. I don't listen to the call. I drown it out with lots of busyness & t.v. I am doing it my way and I am miserable. I've heard the call grow fainter. I'm afraid. Did I miss it? I thought I wanted to miss it but now I'm afraid that I did. I turned from the Holy, creator of the universe & exercised my will to say NO & I am now terrified to return. Unfulfilled, I head to His word, ashamed, timid & yet still longing for Him.
I open His word & there I see Him. So beautiful, running to me as I stumble to put one foot in front of the other. I come in faith that His redemptive offer still stands and that His blood can cover the multitude of sins that I just racked up! I am humbled to the point of pain. Sorrowed so deeply that I left Him & denied Him over & over.
Father, how can you receive me back? I am not worthy of your call. But still you call & I see it in your eyes that you have work for me...beyond my comfort zone...beyond what I know and what's familiar.
You call me to faith. You want me to trust you. You've earned my trust by the incredible love you show me, through your redeeming grace. The fact that your word is meant to light my path suggests that I am going somewhere! I am moving & there is a path that you have ordained for me while I was yet unformed. You call me to take a step, firmly on you my solid rock & step in faith, listening to the call, following your beautiful voice.
Thank you.
Thank you my God.

Hebrews 11:7
By faith Noah, being divinely warned of things not yet seen, moved with godly fear, prepared an ark for the saving of his household, by which he condemned the world and became heir of the righteousness which is according to faith.

Job 29:3
When His lamp shone upon my head, And when by His light I walked through darkness;

Hebrews 12:1
[ The Race of Faith ] Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us,

A real Praise Report

2011-09-12T22:44:00.000-07:00

Psalm 28:7
The LORD is my strength and my shield;My heart trusted in Him, and I am helped; Therefore my heart greatly rejoices, And with my song I will praise Him.
My heart is overwhelmingly thankful. Praise Him with me! This attitude of worship has infiltrated my body & my spirit so beautifully. I just want to rejoice in His faithfulness. I am so thankful and want to praise Him. Just want to praise.
He has saved me, and not only from sin & death but from a meaningless life...a powerless life, a joyless life.
I want to rejoice. I have to praise!
My sweet Grace came through her surgery and has been healing up so incredibly. Infact the day after the surgery the doctor found a small hole that had pulled open in her soft pallet...which would have required further surgery down the line and after 2 weeks, we went in and it had healed and closed without surgery. It was our little miracle and one that came as a result of His grace & your many prayers that flooded heaven that week.
My mom survived Chemo...and so gracefully. What a horrible, long battle to watch. It is so strange to have to endure such misery to save your life. So now she is working full time and straight after work heading to radiation(6 weeks for the breast followed by 6 weeks for the brain. We are continuing to pray for endurance and praying for a miracle of God to remove this brain tumor... that is what she will battle next.

There was a time in the hospital where I questioned God about His faithfulness. I questioned why I couldn't feel Him this time. And was He faithful even when I couldn't feel Him? And then so clearly...the answer. I am Faithful in so much more than the warm fuzzy feeling you are asking for. I am faithful to EVERY single one of my attributes & promises I have made... every minute of every day.
Wow.
Thank you Lord. Wow.

Exodus 15:2
The LORD is my strength and song, And He has become my salvation; He is my God, and I will praise Him; My father’s God, and I will exalt Him.

God is not just worthy to be praised because He got us through a tough summer. God is not faithful because they both are healing up. His faithfulness is not bound by the outcome of any circumstance. I have captured a glimpse of what His faithfulness looks like. It is complete. It is beautiful. It is deep. It is real. It is hard to grasp. It is in His word.

La 3:22 23 "The LORD'S lovingkindnesses indeed never cease, For His compassions never fail. They are new every morning. Great is Thy faithfulness."

Heb 10:23
Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful.

I praise Him! Praise Him with me!

Breaking new ground

2011-07-22T11:55:00.000-07:00

I haven't posted in a while. This month i've felt the darkness, had more questions then answers, and saw the messiness that is my life. Now I can say with beautiful confidence...He gently led me through the darkness, even while I questioned Him all the way.

Yesterday, I kept picturing a tree with roots as I thought about this last month. Picture the roots as faith, breaking new ground as they dive deeper and deeper, and the tree and its branches as praise, giving Him glory in response. As the roots go deeper, the branches raise higher, the tree gets stronger, and is able to weather the storm. All because His grace planted the seed.
When I asked Jesus into my heart as a 7th grader I was this little sprout with all the faith I needed at that point. Though I've always prayed to grow deeper in my faith, I never understood the pain that came with breaking new ground...or atleast in this case. The ground that was broken felt cold, lonely, and frankly I questioned if this is how it was supposed to be. My questions led me to His word. His word is truth. I clung to the promises that He has NEVER broken.
The glorious part of this whole journey and I think the reward of breaking new ground was I had the privilege of experiencing that Yes, He is even here, in the deepest part. He is still here with me at this depth...so my faith grows and my arms raise with praise. I look forward to growing deeper still, no matter the cost, knowing that in His love He will be there.

Gracie had her cleft pallet surgery 2 days ago and just one day after my mom went in for her 4th round of chemo. We have waited 2 years for this surgery, and it took 3 cancellations for me to finally yield that I had no control and was along for the ride. So, I held it loosely, and then all of a sudden the doctor came in, cleared her, and they carried her away to surgery. It was a surreal moment of excitement and terror. The door closed and I thought... that was oddly easy. I just handed her over. Josh and I turned...walked hand in hand to the waiting room...filled with anxious parents. I grabbed for my bible and journal and had to walk outside while Josh napped. (He is such a good example to me...just rest. haha)
All I could do was look out the window. A song came into my heart( I love how He does that).
So I quietly sang...
If my heart is overwhelmed and I cannot hear Your voice
I'll hold on to what is true though I cannot see
If the storms of life they come & the road ahead gets steep
I will lift these hands in faith
I will believe
I remind myself of all that you've done
And the life I have because of your Son

Love came down and rescued me
Love came down and set me free
I am Yours
I am forever Yours
(Love Came Down by Brian Johnson)

I believe His love is deep. How can I KNOW how deep His love is unless I see it in the depths?

The smell of the hospital soap reminds me that we've been here before. It reminds me that He was faithful before.

I am thankful that He took me there. Thankful that He WAS with me. Thankful that my sweet Gracie was handed back to me, whole...all sewn-up and given a fresh start. What a complete joy she is and what a privilege it was to have 2 days with her alone, in the hospital to play dollies, hold her, and pray. She is one of the toughest little joyfilled girls I know. I am so in love with her and so proud to be her mama. God teaches me so much through her.

Jeremiah 17:7-9
7 “ Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD,
And whose hope is the LORD.
8 For he shall be like a tree planted by the waters,
Which spreads out its roots by the river,
And will not fear when heat comes;
But its leaf will be green,
And will not be anxious in the year of drought,
Nor will cease from yielding fruit.

A verse about the wicked:
Job 18
16 His roots are dried out below,
And his branch withers above.

Psalm 37:3
Trust in the LORD, and do good;Dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness.

Phillipians 1:6
6 being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will (be faithful to)complete it until the day of Jesus Christ;

Bo is 1!

2011-06-29T15:50:00.001-07:00

I Chronicles 28:20
“Be strong and of good courage, and do it; do not fear nor be dismayed, for the LORD God—my God—will be with you. He will not leave you nor forsake you, until you have finished all the work for the service of the house of the LORD.

My baby turned 1 yesterday. Just for the record...I'm not ok with this. haha When did this happen? I'm learning that motherhood is a constant letting go process. They just continue to get more and more independant...and we have small goodbye's along the way. Yes, even at 1.
My Bo is hillarious. I just adore his little personality. Right now he prefers crawling and standing on one knee. He loves to say Whoooo at just the right time. He loves his sister and big brother and is officially into EVERYTHING!
He still cuddles and sucks his thumb and that is my favorite time with him.
It is so much fun celebrating milestones in my children's life. What an honor to have family and friends to walk beside us and sometimes carry us in this journey called parenthood.
I love my Bo and I love being his mama!

Psalm 92:1
It is good to give thanks to the LORD,And to sing praises to Your name, O Most High;

Cleft Pallet Surgery for Grace

2011-06-22T15:10:00.001-07:00

A phone call caught me off guard at the store with 3 kids in the cart and barely any room for groceries. I stop in the isle as the voice on the other line says, "Miss Young we have a cancellation and we can get Grace in for surgery this week. Does Thursday work for you?" Umm..sure, yah. Let's do it. I quickly oblige, hang up the phone and realize life is about to change...and just that quick.
My daughter, a beautiful baby girl, born full term at 5 pounds was seemingly perfect. The dr. placed her on my chest. I thought she was beautiful. I ooed and awwed. Then she cried, and I noticed something was wrong. I quickly told the doctor...there is a hole in the back of my baby's throat! They took her into the NICU and confirmed yes, she has a soft pallet cleft. And that was just the beginning. After an emergency run to the hospital at 1 week old, followed by a 6 week stay at the NICU, we found out that the cleft was a byproduct of a chromosome abnormality and she will most likely be delayed her whole life. We had chosen to name her Grace, long before we knew that she really was God's gift of grace to us. Her name was perfect and she was just as God had made her...beautiful and different.
So surgery to fix the cleft is exciting and terrifying. I catch myself looking at her differently. I look at her with compassion, knowing what is coming tomorrow. She has no idea and I could never verbally communicate in a way she could understand. So, I hold her a little longer, kiss her a little more.
I wish I could take it away or maybe just call the whole thing off. But...would that be loving? No, I can't do that. She needs it. She needs this surgery to make her whole, to allow her to eat, to allow her to grow and live.
I pray.
What can I do? I realize all I can do is hold her and be there with her through it, wipe her tears, stroke her blonde curls, rock her to sleep, and never ever leave her side.
All of a sudden it clicks.
God, is this how you feel when you have to lead me through something painful? Now I know it must be necessary or you wouldn't allow it.
That's it Lord. You won't take away the pain; you won't stop the surgery, the trial, the lesson...because with the pain comes healing. I need it. I need it to be whole, to grow, and live. It’s out of love that you allow me to go through it. However, in your compassion, you promise to never leave me alone in the pain. You promise to hold me a little closer. You promise to see me through it and you promise that I will be whole, complete, and beautiful in the end.
I look back and realize that my Jesus has always held me in the hard times. He held me in elementary school when I cried watching my daddy drive away. He held me when my tiny daughter was diagnosed with a syndrome as I held her in my arms in the NICU. He held me this month when I found out my mom has breast cancer and a brain tumor. He has always held me, always loved me, and I know that I would never choose a life without Him. He is my comforter, my joy, and my peace forever.

Psalm 55:22
Cast your cares on the LORD and He will sustain you
1 Peter 5:7
Cast all your anxiety on Him because he cares for you.

Isaiah 41:10 Fear not for I am with you...

Psalm 28:6-7
Blessed be the Lord,
Because He has heard the voice of my supplications!
The Lord is my strength and my shield;
My heart trusted in Him, and I am helped;
Therefore my heart gladly rejoices,
And with my song I will praise Him.

Halle Berry hair

2011-06-09T21:29:00.000-07:00

Isn't she beautiful...with her cute Halle Berry cut?? This was her transition cut, by tomorrow you will see her in a wig or hat. So beautiful.
Please pray for her as her 2nd round of Chemo starts tomorrow.

Psalm 51:12
Restore to me the joy of Your salvation,And uphold me by Your generous Spirit.

I was so down this week. You know those weeks where the darkness seems to prevail and its hard tuning out the lies?
Pheww. Everywhere I looked seemed dark and hopeless.
Except His word.
His truth is never overcome by darkness. His word is always a light leading me out of painful misery.
I praise Him.
Psalm 103:
1 Bless the LORD, O my soul;
And all that is within me, bless His holy name!
2 Bless the LORD, O my soul,
And forget not all His benefits:
3 Who forgives all your iniquities,
Who heals all your diseases,
4 Who redeems your life from destruction,
Who crowns you with lovingkindness and tender mercies,

Isaiah 38:16
O Lord, by these things men live; And in all these things is the life of my spirit; So You will restore me and make me live.

Joel 2:25
25 “ So I will restore to you the years that the swarming locust has eaten...

He is a gracious and merciful God quick to restore and I bless Him...O my soul, I bless Him.

Last day of Preschool

2011-06-09T11:27:00.001-07:00

My baby finished Preschool.
Here he is at the beginning of the year and at the end.
It really is amazing how fast it goes.
I am so proud of him and the changes I've seen in him this year.
He is growing into such a great kid! :)

James 4:8
Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you.

Isaiah 45:2
I will go before thee, and make the crooked places straight.

Dust

2011-05-22T17:03:00.000-07:00

Ephesians 1:7
7 In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of His grace 8 which He made to abound toward us in all wisdom and prudence,

I like to feel like I have it all figured out. I like to think that I know it all. But somedays I am EXTREMELY aware that I know nothing. Infact the only moments I grasp something...its a gift from God. His ways are higher than mine. How could I grasp a Holy God? I am so sinful. I battle my sin nature daily and fail daily.
Oh how I grasp for His forgiveness...how I run to His arms. I hate my sin that seperates us.
I'm humbled by failure. I'm humbled by His presence. I'm humbled when I worship. I'm humbled when God allows my prayers to fill His ears. I'm humbled that I don't know it all.
I'm grateful that I serve the God who does. I can rest in that. I'm grateful that He welcomes me, a sinner, into His presence. I'm grateful that He loves me.
God knelt down and formed me out of the dust of the earth. I am nothing without His life filled breath.
I am on a journey. A journey with Christ. I am learning and growing...all of which He does in me.
Thank you. Thank you Jesus.

Genesis 2:7
And the LORD God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living being.

1 Peter 2
1 Therefore, laying aside all malice, all deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and all evil speaking, 2 as newborn babes, desire the pure milk of the word, that you may grow thereby,[a] 3 if indeed you have tasted that the Lord is gracious.

Psalm 130:3-7

3 If You, LORD, should mark iniquities,
O Lord, who could stand?
4 But there is forgiveness with You,
That You may be feared.

5 I wait for the LORD, my soul waits,
And in His word I do hope.
6 My soul waits for the Lord
More than those who watch for the morning—
Yes, more than those who watch for the morning.

7 O Israel, hope in the LORD;
For with the LORD there is mercy,
And with Him is abundant redemption.

Chemo begins

2011-05-20T00:36:00.001-07:00

God so loved
Jesus came
I believe
The Holy Spirit guides
His word comforts

I am in love.

Simple as that.

My mom starts Chemo tomorrow...her first treatment from 10am-2pm. Her next appointment is 21 days from then. She will lose her beautiful hair in about 2 weeks.

Today on the phone...she calls and asks if we can talk about the one we both love...Jesus.
Fresh from her time with Him...

She feels loved.
She calls Jesus her Savior.
She says the Holy Spirit spoke to her.
She feels comfort in God's word.

She is in love.

Simple as that.

As we speak we are moved to tears by a prayer she wrote, a story of amazing grace, and how true compassion can only come when you are free.

There is nothing like it...walking with Jesus. Nothing like it.

Please pray for my mama! Pray for strength, healing, joy, peace, rest.

P.S. Praise report...they biopsied the lymphnodes they removed during surgery last week. Only 1 of the 11 lymphnodes they took out had cancer. I praise the Lord.

God loved, Jesus came, & I believe
John 3:16
For God so loved the world
that He gave His only son
that whoesoever believes in Him
will not perish but have
everlasting life.

The Holy Spirit guides
John 14:26
But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name, He will teach you all things, and bring to your remembrance all things that I said to you.

The Word comforts
Romans 15:4
For whatever things were written before were written for our learning, that we through the patience and comfort of the Scriptures might have hope.

cancer removed & a weight lifted

2011-05-11T20:50:00.000-07:00

i press on...
i reflect...

i look ahead, eyes fixed on Jesus.

I cracked. I cracked on Mother's day. A Mother's day with surgery looming for my precious momma and I totally blew it. Oh man. I think I blew it. Like a tea kettle, I just exploded with built up pressure that I didn't even realize was there. I just wanted her to rest and take a break before surgery...with me. JUST TAKE A BREAK!!! But, really what I was saying was that I needed a break. I needed to rest, and I wanted to spend time relaxing with her. Maybe I wanted to get away, pretend surgery wasn't coming...that she didn't really have cancer.
Stress is a funny thing. It creeps. And I busy myself so I don't have to think about it...and it creeps.
Luckily my mom and sis are gracious women. My sister quieted me and encouraged me. I was embarassed. We laughed afterward...like a crazy person...I laughed.
I bit off WAY more than I could chew last week, thought I was superwoman, and thought I could skate by without paying attention to the hurt. I was hurting deeply. I was worried.
I thought if I hurt or worried that I wasn't trusting God somehow. I thought if I worried or hurt, I would give God a bad rap. (P.S. He doesn't need my help in giving Him a good reputation. haha)
My Grandma so gently said yesterday, while praying in the waiting room...Shelly, have you ever read Psalms? Have you read how David cried out to God in turmoil? Have you ever read how Job cried out?
It's ok.
You are human.
I cried. A calm came over me. I relaxed. A weight was lifted. Why is there no weight heavier than the one we put on ourselves?

So surgery is over, no complications. They removed the cancer in both her breast and 17 lymphnodes. She came through beautifully. And in Debbie fashion, as she wakes up from anesthesia she is commenting on how cute the pink ruffled tube top is, that they gave her. So funny...so adorable. So we take her home. Can you believe its an outpatient surgery?? nuts.
She is sleeping a lot. Something she needs. She is on pain meds, so no complaints so far. She has my beautiful Grandmother and Grandfather there to care for her...fix her meals, play family movies, and keep her company. Jeff is working during the day, taking care of her in the evening, and handing out meds at night. I pray for his strength. He loves her. It makes me happy.
Thank you for your prayers. I will update you as soon as we know more.
What is to be expected, you say?
They are hoping for a quick recovery from this so that they can start administering chemotherapy and radiation. This will be quite a process, and we don't know until Monday what particular therapy they will be using of each. The reason they want to keep this on schedule is so that they can start working on her brain tumor this Fall.
We also just found out that my sweet daughter Grace's cleft pallet repair surgery is now scheduled for August. So, we will be praying double time!
Oh 2011.

Here is a scripture God gave me yesterday...confirming what my grandma had said. Man He is faithful!!! Amazing in my weakness.
Psalm 69
1 Save me, O God!
For the waters have come up to my neck.
2 I sink in deep mire,
Where there is no standing;
I have come into deep waters,
Where the floods overflow me.
3 I am weary with my crying;
My throat is dry;
My eyes fail while I wait for my God.

5 O God, You know my foolishness;
And my sins are not hidden from You.
6 Let not those who wait for You, O Lord GOD of hosts, be ashamed because of me;
Let not those who seek You be confounded because of me, O God of Israel.
13 But as for me, my prayer is to You,
O LORD, in the acceptable time;
O God, in the multitude of Your mercy,
Hear me in the truth of Your salvation.
14 Deliver me out of the mire,
And let me not sink;
Let me be delivered from those who hate me,
And out of the deep waters.
15 Let not the floodwater overflow me,
Nor let the deep swallow me up;
And let not the pit shut its mouth on me.
16 Hear me, O LORD, for Your lovingkindness is good;
Turn to me according to the multitude of Your tender mercies.
17 And do not hide Your face from Your servant,
For I am in trouble;
Hear me speedily.
18 Draw near to my soul, and redeem it;
29b Let Your salvation, O God, set me up on high.
30 I will praise the name of God with a song,
And will magnify Him with thanksgiving.

My Prince of Peace & a Royal Wedding

2011-05-01T01:35:00.000-07:00

He speaks to me in pictures.
I'm a photographer...and he speaks to me in pictures.

My girlfriend called last week and asked what I was doing for the royal wedding. "Nothing." I replied, "You want to come over?"
We thought an English tea would be just perfect. So, I cut flowers from my moms garden, made scones (for the first time), layered the table with red and blue linens, and set out the pretty dishes.

My girlfriends came over bright and early, brought beautiful fruit and lots of kids. The Tivo was ready...and once the kids were situated, our tea was poured and the remote was in hand...we let out a quick squeal...excited to see the procession and Ohhhh that dress!!
What happened next, I was not prepared for...
The spectacle!
Beautiful buildings & streets lined with eager on-lookers waving their flags...more than you could count...filling the sidewalks & streets. The flag & tree lined streets leading directly to the palace. The sound of the bells ringing.

The cars start to come, one by one. People have been waiting for hours just to catch a glimpse of the royalty inside.
And who's in this car? I see the uniform. Wow...It's Prince William, the groom!! The crowds are going crazy...welcoming their future King.

All I can think...
God, you allowed this. Why do you allow such a spectacle. Why is my heart pounding in my chest.
Is this a picture of you? Is this what it will be like...when you come again? I know its silly, but it's all I can liken it to. And my heart is still pounding. Oh how I long for it to be You! To see you making a triumphant entry...coming to receive your bride, the church. The honor, the glory, the crowds shouting your name. Jesus! The Son of God! The Prince of Peace!

And then, the moment we've been waiting for...there she is! The beautiful bride, coming to be presented to her husband, the prince. She becomes a princess today, and only through him.
God created this. There is a reason why 3 billion people wanted to watch a wedding...why our hearts pounded when we saw royalty.
A couple tears started rolling down my cheeks...my girlfriends and I could't stop interjecting with different parallels we saw.
Even now it sounds silly describing it...you just had to see it.

And then the ceremony...and my jaw drops. Romans 12!
God's true and living word proclaimed to 3 billion people of different race and culture. The true and living word of God that has been promised (Isaiah 55:11) to never return void. The name of Jesus Christ proclaimed and honored by earthly royalty, for all to hear. It was Amazing.

It started out a silly, girly, idea...let's have a tea party and watch a royal wedding...and we ended up so incredibly blessed. God met us there, he gently spoke to us in pictures and filled our hearts with longing. Longing for the real thing...the true King of Kings...the true wedding feast.

Isaiah 62:5
And as the bridegroom rejoices over the bride, So shall your God rejoice over you.

Ezekiel 16:11
I adorned you with ornaments, put bracelets on your wrists, and a chain on your neck. 12 And I put a jewel in your nose, earrings in your ears, and a beautiful crown on your head. 13 Thus you were adorned with gold and silver, and your clothing was of fine linen, silk, and embroidered cloth. You ate pastry of fine flour, honey, and oil. You were exceedingly beautiful, and succeeded to royalty.

Mothers Day Portraits

2011-04-26T11:44:00.000-07:00

Provrebs 31:28
Her children rise up and call her blessed;
Her husband also, and he praises her:

Contact me or view my work...here

birthday fun

2011-04-23T00:35:00.000-07:00

Psalm 23:1
The LORD is my shepherd;I shall not want.

What a fun and crazy birthday month we had. Gavin had a small Nerf gun party at the park. Simple and pure fun. We then had a family party right after for both kids. Our kids were in heaven jumping from one loving embrace to the next. Sometimes I am amazed at Gods provision. Its a little thing here, a little thing there. Lately God meets my needs as they happen and his gifts of provision still amaze me. What fun. Thank you dear friends.
Matthew 7:11
If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask Him!

The author and finisher

2011-04-22T23:53:00.000-07:00

My Creator, became my Savior & my Redeemer.
He made me so gently, so purposefully, and so perfectly.

Man fell in the garden. I was born a sinner.

My sin seperated us. And death was coming for me.

He made a way to me...even before I chose to come back.

He sent Jesus to take my place. And while He died...He thought about me, and He thought about you. And endured it, because He considered it joy to be reunited with me...with you...His child, His creation.

He rose again, conquering death and an infinitely holy God was holy enough to cover every sin ever commited.

My sin has been erased because of what He did for me TODAY...2,000 years ago.

I Celebrate. I rejoice. I thank Him. I praise Him.

He saved me! He saved me! Hosanna!! Hosanna!!

Breast Surgeon: Step 1

2011-04-12T15:31:00.000-07:00

My sweet momma(you may spell it Mama...but I spell it Momma) had her long awaited appointment with the breast surgeon today. Her voice on the phone sounded exhausted. And because I'm her daughter...I know its partly physical but mostly emotional exhaustion. She hopes. She has always been hopeful as long as I've known her. Hopeful for my father. Hopeful for my sister. Hopeful in everything. But news is news. And hard news...exhausting.
So here is good news and bad. Allthough there really is no such thing when God is in control.

Good news: Out of 4 stages, 4 being the deadliest. She is in Stage 1.
Bad news: Out of 9 grades, 9 being the most aggressive/invasive. She is a 9.

She has a week of testing ahead of her...starting Monday. Please pray for endurance, peace, and 'good news'.
They estimate surgery to remove the cancer in 4-8 weeks.

Thank you dear friends for your incredible faithfulness in praying for my mom. Pleaes continue.

James 5:16
Confess your trespasses to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much.

Big girl

2011-04-12T15:26:00.001-07:00

My sweet little Grace.
I can't even write without smiling...picturing her wrinkled nose smile and bashful bowed head. My little girl, though small, makes an impact on any room she enters and on any heart that holds her.
She reaches for you... loves to be social, and loves a room full of girls. She wants to be in the middle, wants to be heard, will talk with you, play with you, reach for you.
She signs words like: More, All done, Eat, Milk, Please, Thank you, Beautiful, Hugs, Kisses...you know, all the important ones.
She says words like: Mama, Dada, Nana, Eh, UhUh...you know, all the important ones. :)
She can pull to stand, walk along the couch, but prefers to crawl fast.
She has the softest blonde hair and chubby little wrists.
She also has weak legs, a hole in the back of her throat, eczema, a g-tube, and silly little things like that.

Grace's life has always been an adventure. Its hard for me to write about. But, I must illuminate.
Taking care of Grace is a gift. Allthough, sometimes hard, a gift. It's something that God gives me stamina for.
Many of our days are full of yucky tubie stuff...throwing up because we pumped her food a little faster than her stomach could handle that day, a valve comes open and leaks all over the bed/couch/me...more laundry. We wake up again to find that the feeding we started last night had an error and she didn't actually get any food. She crys again unable to be consoled because of constipation. Another ear-ache/run to the dr./strand of anti-biotics. Anti-biotics means a diaper rash, and bleeding, but luckily no constipation for that week. 6 therapy sessions...translating to 3 days/week at the hospital. The valet's know us by name. We are on the VIP list and get free valet parking. Haha...who wants to be a VIP on the hospital parking list? ME! ME! haha I actually thank God for it everytime I pull in.

She is ALWAYS happy (unless her brother hits her or pulls her hair). She is always improving in her gross motor, fine motor, speech, and eating developments. What a gift. She laughs. She is funny. She dances from the waist up. She is so darn cute.
She is my daughter...my beautiful daughter.
She is my joy and I am so proud to be her momma.
Happy 2nd Birthday Gracie girl!!!!!

Romans 5
1 Therefore, having been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, 2 through whom also we have access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and rejoice in hope of the glory of God. 3 And not only that, but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance;

I am not ashamed

2011-04-10T23:28:00.000-07:00

I know this post is going to make you uncomfortable.
We don't like to make eachother uncomfortable. We don't like consequence or bad news.
But I'm glad my mom's doctor wasn't afraid to tell her the truth, wasn't afraid to make her uncomfortable...because there is still time! There is still hope!

This life.
What is the point?
I must point to Him. I must.
I must declare the longing I have in my heart for His truth, for His reign. I'm ready. I'm eager.
However, I'm burdened. I must share. But I don't want to make you uncomfortable.

Josh & I were given a glorious date night...we loved it, but ...
What is the point of date night? If not for fellowship & love... I know, I know.
But here we are...looking at random books, filled with distractions and
nonsense...just people's attempts at making a point.
So, I invest... $, precious time...I buy in. Its easy.
I look at faces...busy people. Precious people. Souls. Souls Christ died for.
I know the point and I want to shout it. Why don't I? Why don't I?

The car ride home...I explain the cry of my heart, the longing of my soul, the dreams I have of Zion. Glorious dreams. The bible paints a picture(truth) more amazing than any sci-fi novel on those shelves.

I want to be there with The Almighty God. I want to watch Him reign on this soil, our soil...on a throne.
Ruling in PERFECT justice.
There is NO ONE LIKE OUR GOD. The Alpha The Omega, The Beginning and The End.
This is truth...this is REAL. This is the point.

And I don't know how, or fully why...but THIS TIME MATTERS.
He says it matters.
Colossians 4
3 meanwhile praying also for us, that God would open to us a door for the word, to speak the mystery of Christ, for which I am also in chains, 4 that I may make it manifest, as I ought to speak.
5 Walk in wisdom toward those who are outside, redeeming the time. 6 Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt, that you may know how you ought to answer each one.

Joshua 24:15
...choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods which your fathers served that were on the other side of the River, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you dwell. But as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD.”

Today determines if we will celebrate His reign or mourn it. Regardless... HE WILL REIGN.

Micah 4:7
So the LORD will reign over them in Mount Zion From now on, even forever.

Here is a glimpse of my dream...

Revelation 21

1 Now I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away. Also there was no more sea. 2 Then I, John, saw the holy city, New Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. 3 And I heard a loud voice from heaven saying, “Behold, the tabernacle of God is with men, and He will dwell with them, and they shall be His people. God Himself will be with them and be their God. 4 And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away.”
5 Then He who sat on the throne said, “Behold, I make all things new.” And He said to me, “Write, for these words are true and faithful.”
6 And He said to me, “It is done! I am the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End. I will give of the fountain of the water of life freely to him who thirsts. 7 He who overcomes shall inherit all things, and I will be his God and he shall be My son. 8 But the cowardly, unbelieving, abominable, murderers, sexually immoral, sorcerers, idolaters, and all liars shall have their part in the lake which burns with fire and brimstone, which is the second death.”

Choose Him today. Make Jesus your Lord of Lords. Today...right now. Live...live with me. He gives it freely, the price has already been paid. He died on the cross for your sins.
That is why I celebrate Easter. That is why I celebrate that beautiful display of love in death. He conquered death in my place. I have accepted the gift. Will you accept the gift and live FOREVER? The alternative is pain/torment forever. And hell is just as real as the heaven I long for. By doing nothing...you are choosing...death.

This is the point. This is the reason I was born...not to live a happy life in a home, married with 3 kids, and a fun job, or even suffer a tumor & cancer with my mom.
No.
I was born to worship Him and to speak His story.
And I'm afraid...I'm shaking.
But He compels me. He compels me to write for you.
I refuse to be ashamed of the gospel.
I refuse...because if you didn't know. If you didn't know...and something happened to you...
This is real.
He is real.
He is the point.
I know this post is making you uncomfortable.
We don't like to make eachother uncomfortable, we don't like consequence, we don't like bad news.
But I'm glad my mom's doctor wasn't afraid to tell her the truth, wasn't afraid to make her uncomfortable when they dianosed her with both breast cancer and a brain tumor...because there is still time! There is still hope!!
There is time for healing. There is time for repentance, forgiveness, and life.

Pray with me...
Father, I thank you for Jesus' death and resurrection.
I am a sinner and need forgiveness from a Holy God.
Please forgive me.
Lead me.
Show me your way. Teach me through your word, the bible.
Holy Spirit come into my life.
Please, be the point of my life.
Thank you gracious God.

Come to Easter service with me! Seriously. I would love it.
These are pictures of Gavin at Vacation Bible School this week...unashamed. :)

A new day

2011-04-08T13:33:00.000-07:00

Isaiah 40:31
But those who wait on the LORD Shall renew their strength;
They shall mount up with wings like eagles,
They shall run and not be weary,
They shall walk and not faint.

Today feels lighter! He has led me through a dark couple weeks and today...light. A new day. The rain stopped, sun poured in, & new leaves unfolded on the branch outside my window.
I'm refreshed by rest and He fills me with hope again.

Yesterday, I wanted to bathe in self-pity. I mean bathe...roll around in it, lap it up...you know?...just yuk. I felt sorry for myself, I was frustrated, exhausted and honestly all I wanted to do was sit on the couch and sulk.
And I COULDN'T. haha. I couldn't because in His grace, He wouldn't let me.
I didn't realize it was His doing until the end of the day...and I just started laughing.
So here's how the day went:
I had a school photoshoot from 6:30-11:30am, then off to pick up the kids, followed by a quick pick up at my business partners house, who made me laugh...and brought me out of it for a minute. I then head home, the babies need to be changed and fed, & Gavin wants a 5 fifth meal at 1pm. :) Pheww. I finish getting the kids taken care of, I throw on too tight sweat pants and a t-shirt(inside out) and start picking up my messy house. There is a knock at the door and its my sweet and thoughtful neighbor dropping by for a visit. We have a great time talking and playing(my shirt still inside out, and my pants still too tight). She heads home and I throw some rice on for dinner, a quick bite & the doorbell rings...its another dear friend stopping by to pick-up snow chains. We chat and she encourages me & makes me smile, as always. Now its time to start the bedtime routine. The kids are all down, read to, tucked in and happy in bed. And, just then, my handsome husband comes home (late) and wants to talk. I'm tired Lord...so I vent my frustrations to Josh of how all I wanted to do, all day, was sulk and now your home!
We laugh...it feels good to laugh. He is so gentle and understanding.
We laugh at how God wouldn't let me sit in darkness and wouldn't let me slip into depression. He brought precious gifts...precious people to keep me occupied, speak life, and make me laugh...just until the darkness passed.
Is that what it looks like? Is that Him walking with me? Is that Him never leaving or forsaking me? I think so. :)

Jeremiah 31
9 They shall come with weeping,
And with supplications I will lead them.
I will cause them to walk by the rivers of waters,
In a straight way in which they shall not stumble;

Psalm 142
1 I cry out to the LORD with my voice;
With my voice to the LORD I make my supplication.
2 I pour out my complaint before Him;
I declare before Him my trouble.
3 When my spirit was overwhelmed within me,
Then You knew my path.
In the way in which I walk
7 The righteous shall surround me,
For You shall deal bountifully with me.”

Deut. 31:8
And the LORD, He is the One who goes before you.
He will be with you,
He will not leave you nor forsake you;
do not fear nor be dismayed.”

Psalm 23:3
He restores my soul;

I'm done...no more sulking. Its a NEW DAY! I'm enjoying it, drinking it in and thankful for a God that NEVER leaves me, even when I turn and look favorably at darkness. He gently turns and nudges my gaze back...back into His light filled eyes. Amazing.

crawl away

2011-04-07T15:17:00.000-07:00

Deuteronomy 7:9
“Therefore know that the LORD your God, He is God, the faithful God who keeps covenant and mercy for a thousand generations with those who love Him and keep His commandments;

I'm weary and tired today. I want to crawl away. Pretend its not happening. I feel like I'm in emotional/spiritual bootcamp and I'm tired. My instructor is trying to get my eye contact, hold my gaze, and keep me going...for my own good. :) Or maybe He just wants to catch me on my way down.
God's word and laughter have been good medicine...and I'm hoping the nap I'm about to take is the cherry on top. :) But thats just me. And that's just today.
I'm sure my mom has a different story...full of hope and joy. :)

In hopes to keep all informed...

The news today is that my moms brain tumor is benign and they will try a
non-invasive radiation treatment to shrink or stunt tumor growth. Its a dedicated, daily-5 week treatment. This will hopefully put off surgery for a year or two. The brain surgeon at UCLA said most definitely the priority has shifted to the breast cancer. He feels the breast cancer must be treated, first, before they attempt anything for the brain tumor.
She is already experiencing some loss of function/feeling in her face from
the brain tumor. sigh... This makes me so sad.
If the loss of function gets worse, they will go in right away and remove the tumor.
Here is what we are praying for, of course if and only if it falls into God's will...
We are praying that she retains function, beats this breast
cancer, and that the radiation would work in shrinking the brain tumor.
Tuesday is her appointment with the breast surgeon.

Hang with us friends...it looks like a long road ahead.

breast cancer & a brain tumor

2011-04-06T10:22:00.000-07:00

My mom, after a routine mamogram...days after the news of a brain tumor, was told that she has a mass. Yesterday, a call...cancer...its breast cancer.

She didn't want to tell anyone until we knew for certain. Probably because...ITS CRAZY. Breast cancer and a tumor. That's impossible...right?
This is where I broke down...at a table full of unfolded laundry, tissues all over, my lifeline in hand, and dear friends praying. So, after they leave I snap a picture. This is what holy ground looks like.

She asks me to share...but I can't. I'm literally frozen.

After a long night of silence...In the morning I feel compelled to write.

I wake up and have a life filled, treasure in my inbox. This was her gift today... A letter, from God himself...written to her. Heavenly assurance, purpose for the fire, hope in the refining...to be more precious than gold, so precious in His hands. Beautiful, pure, holy. Praise wells up. Glory be His name.

1 Peter 1:3-7

A Heavenly Inheritance

3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who according to His abundant mercy has begotten us again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, 4 to an inheritance incorruptible and undefiled and that does not fade away, reserved in heaven for you, 5 who are kept by the power of God through faith for salvation ready to be revealed in the last time.
6 In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while, if need be, you have been grieved by various trials, 7 that the genuineness of your faith, being much more precious than gold that perishes, though it is tested by fire, may be found to praise, honor, and glory at the revelation of Jesus Christ.

Please pray dear friends. Please pray. God is listening.

if you see me and I'm joyful

2011-04-01T14:54:00.001-07:00

I am among other things a mom of a special needs child, and recently, the daughter of a mom with a brain tumor and breast cancer.

If you see me and I'm joyful...

Psalm 16:11
You will show me the path of life;In Your presence is fullness of joy.

...I've been in His presence.

If you see me and I seem strong...

Nehemiah 8:10
Do not sorrow, for the joy of the LORD is your strength.”

...the Lord is my strength and my strong refuge.

If you see me and I'm broken...

Psalm 38: 8
8 I am feeble and severely broken;
I groan because of the turmoil of my heart.

...I'm human.

Psalm 71:5-8
5 For You are my hope, O Lord GOD;
You are my trust from my youth.
6 By You I have been upheld from birth;
You are He who took me out of my mother’s womb.
My praise shall be continually of You.

7 I have become as a wonder to many,
But You are my strong refuge.
8 Let my mouth be filled with Your praise
And with Your glory all the day.

I am, above all else, a daughter of the King.

Strong

2011-03-30T22:49:00.000-07:00

Our strong child. Strong since before you were born...even kicking the doctor on the way out and pulling a baby handful of my hair out when they layed you on my chest. :) Though startled, you captured my heart. You perplex me, and yet I adore the sweet way about you.
Bo Radman Young is 9 months old and now has a drooly, toothy grin, loves to kneel on one knee and practicly stand on the other leg and balance. He follows me around and climbs up my leg whenever I stop. :) Today, he crawled up to me with a muddy grin and spit out a rock at my feet. no joke. So much for free reign while we all play outside.
I am so proud of him and pray that God becomes his strength. That his relationship with God would sustain him and give him peace and rest. I pray that his intense nature would be focused on furthing God's kingdom, by loving others. I pray his passion would be contagious and his strength would only be in and through Christ.

1 Kings 2:2
...be strong, therefore, and prove yourself a man. And keep the charge of the LORD your God: to walk in His ways, to keep His statutes, His commandments, His judgments, and His testimonies, as it is written in the Law of Moses, that you may prosper in all that you do and wherever you turn;
Joshua 1:7
Only be strong and very courageous, that you may observe to do according to all the law which Moses My servant commanded you; do not turn from it to the right hand or to the left, that you may prosper wherever you go.

1 Samuel 4:9
Be strong and conduct yourselves like men.

Come inside and rest

2011-03-27T00:32:00.000-07:00

After the news this week, I have definitely been a little mushier with my momma. I'm eager to receive her calls, I appreciate her voice, thoughts, time...everything.
So, the other day I got a call from her. I paused seeing her picture on my phone as it rang. I thought what if I never saw that picture again. What if I didn't get a call from her everyday?
We talk and she asks if she can stop by in a couple minutes. A little excited, I said, "Yes, comeover!" We hang up and I busy myself tidying a few things. Making it pretty for her. She likes pretty. I move the flowers just right and pick up the toys strewn all over the living room. I put a kettle of hot water on, for tea. I start dishing out a little strawberry shortcake on the pretty plates. She likes pretty. I want to make it pretty for her. I turn on some music. The atmosphere is set, she will like this. I want her to feel relaxed when she comes in. I want her to sit and stay a while. The babies are sleeping, we won't have any distractions. I eagerly await her arrival and I look out the window of my front door and think she should be here by now.
I see her. Yay. She's here.
Oh, she's talking to someone on her phone, in the car. She'll be a minute.
I decide to watch her. Tears start pouring down my face as I stare, unbeknownst to her. I appreciate her hand gestures for the first time. I think about how beautiful she is. Why won't she come in? I'm ready. I'm so eager to get to talk to her. Doesn't she know the time is precious. I want to have her all to myself.
As I stare and pray for her in my head. God beautifully reveals to me His heart.

He gently says to me, "Sweet Shelly, don't you realize...This is how I wait for you. This is how I long for you. I have gifts waiting for you, in my presence. I wait for you, watching, eager, praying for you, waiting for you to look at me, join me, dine with me." Why are you so distracted my daughter? Come inside and rest, enjoy what I have for you."

Psalm 16:11
You will show me the path of life;
In Your presence is fullness of joy;
At Your right hand are pleasures forevermore.

I will never forget that beautiful word picture He gave me as I leaned on my door post that day. I'm so grateful it was while I was watching my mom. Her beautiful image burned in my mind forever.

Psalm 73
21 Thus my heart was grieved,
And I was vexed in my mind.
22 I was so foolish and ignorant;
I was like a beast before You.
23 Nevertheless I am continually with You;
You hold me by my right hand.
24 You will guide me with Your counsel,
And afterward receive me to glory.

25 Whom have I in heaven but You?
And there is none upon earth that I desire besides You.
26 My flesh and my heart fail;
But God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.

27 For indeed, those who are far from You shall perish;
You have destroyed all those who desert You for harlotry.
28 But it is good for me to draw near to God;
I have put my trust in the Lord GOD,
That I may declare all Your works.

I cling to your promises

2011-03-22T16:34:00.000-07:00

"Did mom get ahold of you yet?"
was the message.
My heart sank. I knew something was wrong.
I knew something was wrong. My stomach hurt.

Lord,
My mom has a brain tumor.?.
seriously?

I'm on the phone explaining every detail I know to yet, another person. It sounds heartless, cold, and medical.
But, its all I can do. Because if I really show how I'm feeling. I won't be able to function, communicate, or pick up my kids.
So, I hang up, a little sting in my eyes, and a knot in my throat.
crap.
Is it real? Does it mean its real if I allow myself to cry? What will happen if I allow my self to fully emotionally explore what these precious last few days mean.
Every day is few and precious...every day is fragile. Yet, I'm face to face with a real, tangible enemy...a tumor.
A tumor that threatens a beautiful life... a life that is intertwined with mine. She is mine...not just a life. She is MY mom. My momma.
My mom has a tumor.
See...I didn't even want to go here. I'm ready to celebrate her any day...but not like this. Not like this. This is not one of those letters I want to write to remember her every good quality. One you hear read about a distant person, whom you will soon forget. No...she will live.

Gavin just hurt his finger, numb inside, I sit on the floor and hold him while he cries. I'm staring at the floor. Rubbing his back, I'm lost in thought. What is happening? God, I'm sad and afraid to live a life without her in it. I profess that You are in control. I profess that I believe heaven is better. Do I believe it? Do I believe it now? Does she?
Yes.
Yes, my hope is still in You. Yes, my pain is real, but Your love is even more tangible right now.

I cling to your promises...
Acts 17:24-28
24 Him I proclaim to you:God, who made the world and everything in it, since He is Lord of heaven and earth, does not dwell in temples made with hands. 25 Nor is He worshiped with men’s hands, as though He needed anything, since He gives to all life, breath, and all things. 26 And He has made from one blood every nation of men to dwell on all the face of the earth, and has determined their preappointed times and the boundaries of their dwellings, 27 so that they should seek the Lord, in the hope that they might grope for Him and find Him, though He is not far from each one of us; 28 for in Him we live and move and have our being,

2 Chronicles 32:7
“Be strong and courageous; do not be afraid nor dismayed before the king of Assyria, nor before all the multitude that is with him; for there are more with us than with him. With him is an arm of flesh; but with us is the LORD our God, to help us and to fight our battles.”

Psalm 50:15
Call upon Me in the day of trouble;I will deliver you, and you shall glorify Me.”

Gavin celebrates a 5th birthday and new life!!

2011-03-09T15:50:00.000-08:00

Gavin has stolen my heart. I think he is one pretty special kid. It is with great joy that I get to celebrate him today.
I'll tell you a special story that happened this week.
I could repeat it 100 times over and it would never get old.

It was Thursday morning, we were supposed to be at bible study but Gracie had a runny nose. I was dissapointed but honestly, enjoying the quiet morning, lounging in my jammies. The tv was off (we had had too much of it) and I was at my computer, catching up on work, while Gavin was drawing at the table. I had music on and the babies were crawling all over eachother in the kitchen, happy as can be. From the dining room Gavin asks, "Momma, where is the cross?" I asked, "Did you ask that because you heard it in the song thats playing?" He said, "Yah", pretty matter of factly. The song was still going...Lead me to the cross where your love poured out...
I explained as simply as I could that Jesus died on the real cross 2000 years ago once and for ALL but that the song was explaining a longing to go to the cross because thats where Jesus forgave our sins. I explained that if we ask Jesus into our heart then He forgives our sin. He then said, "Yah because Jesus can't live in our hearts if there is sin in it." Blown away...I said, "You're absolutely right." We smile and he goes back to coloring while I turn back to the screen. Maybe 30 seconds go by and I hear him say, "Jesus, will you come into my heart?"
I turn quickly to see him shrugging his shoulders and looking upward. He catches my gaze and says, "Did He hear me?"
I gave him a big hug and said, "Yes. He absolutely heard you and you just made His heart (and mine) SOOO happy."
He couldn't wait to tell Daddy and we celebrated that night at dinner.

What a precious gift.
God's gift of life is so simple and is so easy to receive.
We like to complicate it.
Maybe that's why Christ told His disciples in
Matthew 18:3 “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.

Joy in trial

2011-03-01T19:11:00.001-08:00

Watch and see my dear friend & amazing athlete, share her story about how her faith has brought her joy in trial.

Watch more video of 2011 University of Washington Final Qualifier on flotrack.org

In the spring of 2008 the nation with hit with one of the best high school state meets in history as the fastest times ever were run in the boys 3200 and girls 1600. Christine Babcock ran 4:33 that day in May (splitting 4:17 for 1500). One of best prep's in history entered her freshman year at the University of Washington and she delivered with a bang. Christine was the top freshman at the 2008 NCAA XC Championships and 7th overall in the country as she led the dominant Huskies to a national title. She went on to become a finalist in the 1500 meters at the 2009 NCAA Outdoor Championships. Since then Christine has had trouble putting together stints of healthy training. Now on the road to recovery, Christine talks about her journey and what its been like to be sideline as one of the best. Her positive attitude is unlike many others out there and just a small part of what makes her such a wonderful person. All the best to Christine on her road to get back to the top!

February

2011-02-23T00:19:00.000-08:00

I tell my kids I love them everyday.
And then I ask them, "But who loves you even more than I do?" The answer is always Jesus.
I get such a short time to pour into them.
I want them to think of Him when they walk outside. When their sick.
When they receive a gift. When they give a gift. When they dance. When they cry.
My only dream for my kids is that they would know just how loved they are by Jesus
and that they would reciprocate.

We've had so much fun this month...

Josh and Gavin headed to Daddy & Me night at Preschool.

Bo is 8 months old!! He is a joy! He is crawling now, gives ooey gooey drooley kisses. He whines when he's not held, fed, or not being fed fast enough. He is a bruiser and I love that he smiles so big that his eyes disappear. :)
Grace is 23 months!! What?? I can't believe my baby girl is almost 2!! She is my precious gift. She loves to sign. We can't learn words fast enough. I love seeing her communicate. She recently signed "Please + Eat!" If you know her...this is amazing. She wants to eat! She is doing great and I promise a full update on her health is coming soon! :)
Gavin will be 5 in 2 weeks!! My baby...almost in Kindergarten. He is my sweetheart. Really. He is thoughtful, kind, and loves to play with his baby brother and sister. He is high energy, loves to ask questions, but just a joy to be around. He makes me laugh everyday. And I love to ignore the fact that one day he will grow up and not want to cuddle any longer. I ban the thought. :)

The monkey trap

2011-02-21T23:41:00.000-08:00

As the story goes, the monkey hunters cut a small hole or slit in a coconut and fill it with rice. Then they tie the coconut to a tree or attach it to a stake in the ground. The hole in the coconut is big enough for the monkey to get his hand in, but not big enough to get his hand out if it is filled with rice. As the hunters approach, the monkey desperately tries to get his fist out of the coconut, but can’t seem to understand that gaining his freedom is simply a matter of letting go of the rice.

Why do I hold so tightly to the things that are trapping me? Is it what I'm holding...or is it the actual act of holding something? Something I control, something that is mine. And then I look up and wonder how or why am I bound.
What are you not willing to let go of? What is of so much value that it costs you your life?

I too have been bound.

I too bear guilt and shame.

I too am letting go.

I too have been made free.

Hebrews 12:1-2
...let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith...

1 Peter 5:7-11
Casting all your cares upon Him for He cares for you.
Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour.
Resist him, steadfast in the faith,
knowing that the same sufferings are experienced by your brotherhood in the world.
But may the God of all grace, who called us to His eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after you have suffered a while,
perfect, establish, strengthen, and settle you.
To Him be the glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen.

Happy Valentines Day!

2011-02-15T08:07:00.000-08:00

We love Him because He first loved us.
I John 4:19

What a fun day. On Sunday afternoon I drove home after a shoot and as I pulled in the driveway I noticed Josh was loading the last kiddo in the car. What? Where are you going? He says, jump in the car, we're going out! YaY!!! Josh found babysitting, took me out for Sushi and a movie...the best. No one calms me like Josh. I love him forever. Thennnnn Valentines night we got to have a fun family night... take out, movie, homemade cookies, valentines, kisses, dancing...the works. I found myself thanking God in those moments last night. You know those moments where you look around and everyone is laughing,smiling,drooling,dancing...so grateful...i mean really grateful.xoxo

Feeding tube awareness week!

2011-02-09T09:18:00.000-08:00

Its feeding tube awareness week!
Here is Gracie at 22 months old in all her pink glory.
The mirror seems to be her favorite past time right now and I just die when she crawls away from the mirror, stops in her tracks, and looks back one more time to check out her backside. I die.
I love how she looks at herself...and especially here.
To read how Gracies journey began read here:
(see the link on the side bar, under her picture)

I wish I could express

2011-01-10T20:37:00.000-08:00

There is no one like My God.

I wish I could express what life is like walking with Jesus. Its amazing. Like...new adventures around every corner, a glimpse that He is directing my exact steps, a homeless man that becomes a friend, a tap on the shoulder when I'm selfish, a gentle correction when I'm wrong, like a quiet walk to the store with my dad to return what I've stolen, a hug when I'm overwhelmed, a conversation when I'm lonely, an army of angels sent to watch over my family while I sleep, an answer before my question. I think if you only knew how freeing and wonderful it is you would be walking right along with me.
I wish I could express.

Its His kindness that leads us to repentance...not the law. I'm sorry Christians have pushed the LAW on you. I now follow the law, in response to the gift of life, Christ gave me. I didn't follow the law first. I'm free. Christ died so that you can be free too...if you only would respond and believe.
Its the easiest thing you will ever do...He made it easy. A simple prayer of faith, a simple yes, and instant LIFE for eternity and to boot, a life that is fullfilling and full of hope. And He gives you His word, the Bible, as a precious guide. How could you refuse?

Your creator wants a relationship with you. Even more than a parent would want with their child.
When your laying in bed tonight...talk to Him. When its quiet and your seemingly alone...talk to Him. Ask Him to reveal Himself to you and He will respond. He wants you to come just as you are.
Jeremiah 29:12 Then you will call upon Me and go and pray to Me, and I will listen to you.
13 And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart.

And Faith...I was asked a couple weeks ago "How, how do you have faith that its all going to be ok?" At the time I gave a simple answer...but couldn't stop thinking about it all week.
It really comes down to God's trustworthiness...
He loves me more than anyone ever will.
He created me...so He knows me better than I know myself.
He promised me.

Like a child holding his fathers hand to cross the street, completely oblivious of the near misses that are all around him, he trusts his father. Why? Because he believes his father is trustworthy. His father loves him so much that he would jump in front of an oncoming car to protect his son. He would die for his son. And thats exactly what Christ did for you. He died, so that you could live.

Psalm 146

The Happiness of Those Whose Help Is the LORD

1 Praise the LORD!

Praise the LORD, O my soul!
2 While I live I will praise the LORD;
I will sing praises to my God while I have my being.

3 Do not put your trust in princes,
Nor in a son of man, in whom there is no help.
4 His spirit departs, he returns to his earth;
In that very day his plans perish.

5 Happy is he who has the God of Jacob for his help,
Whose hope is in the LORD his God,
6 Who made heaven and earth,
The sea, and all that is in them;
Who keeps truth forever,
7 Who executes justice for the oppressed,
Who gives food to the hungry.
The LORD gives freedom to the prisoners.

8 The LORD opens the eyes of the blind;
The LORD raises those who are bowed down;
The LORD loves the righteous.
9 The LORD watches over the strangers;
He relieves the fatherless and widow;
But the way of the wicked He turns upside down.

10 The LORD shall reign forever—
Your God, O Zion, to all generations.

Praise the LORD!

O God, You are my God

2010-12-01T11:30:00.000-08:00

Psalm 63: 1-8

O God, You are my God;
Early will I seek You;
My soul thirsts for You;
My flesh longs for You
In a dry and thristy land
Where there is no water.
So I have looked for You in the sancturary,
To see Your power and Your glory.

Because Your lovingkindness is better than life,
My lips shall praise You.
Thus I will bless You while I live;
I will lift up my hands in Your name.
My soul shall be satisfied as with marrow and fatness,
And my mouth shall praise You with joyful lips.

When I remember You on my bed,
I meditate on you in the night watches.
Because You have been my help,
Therefore in the shadow of Your wings I will rejoice,
My soul follows close behind You;
Your right hand upholds me.

We had two people close to our family pass away this past week and it got me thinking about heaven.
Oh, how I long to be with Jesus. And, oh I long to bless Him while I live.

10 years together!!

2010-11-24T00:32:00.000-08:00

I have loved this man for most of my life. We were kids when we first started dating(17 & 20) and have practically grown-up together. Seriously, how could I have known what I was getting myself into...only God could have granted me the desires of my heart in human form...Josh. He is honorable, has truly great character. He loves Jesus, and takes my kids and I to church every Sunday. He makes me laugh and always catches me off guard. He gets me out of my head, and breaks me when I am taking life and myself to seriously. He tries to hold on while I talk about 29 different subjects in 2 minutes. :) He NEVER complains. He LISTENS. He loves me with his eyes. He protects me, and provides for our family. He plays with our kids and makes our home JOYFUL.
I could seriously go on and on...so I will... He is my KNIGHT in shining armor, my HERO that daily stands along side me, takes my hand, and quietly leads me through the craziness. He is a rock...so SMART and steady when my emotions are all over the place. He is my BEST FRIEND and I'm better for being married to him for these wonderful 10 years. What an incredibly blessed girl I am!

Our anniversary weekend!!!
We GOT AWAY!!! HOORAY!!
Thanks to amazing moms who watched ALL 3 of our kids, we were able to get away for a night in Marina Del Rey. The weekend started early Saturday morning as we drove into Pasadena to catch a UCLA football game at the Rose Bowl. They WON with 0 seconds on the clock and it was a blast to watch! yay!
Next we were off to Marina Del Rey Marriott. We relaxed all of Sunday, lounged around, watched a movie, read ,went in the spa. The extra hour from daylight savings time, relaxation and quiet were little gifts from heaven that day. We headed into Hollywood for yummy yummy Sushi and then made our way home.
It was so wonderful to have that time away to reconnect and come back refreshed, ready to tackle the next 10 years. :)

A Halloween Open House

2010-11-09T23:07:00.000-08:00

Psalm 118:24
This is the day the LORD has made; We will rejoice and be glad in it.

We invited our neighbors over!! Something we have been wanting to do since the day we moved in, and it finally happened. We love our home and we love where God has put us and we are so excited to be involved in our community. So, a bunch of families came over, we ate pie and drank cider, roamed the neighborhood, and returned home with bags full of loot. All in all it was a great night. Even Bo made a new friend...Jacob, a new neighbor that is only 4 weeks older than him! Hooray!
Gavin wanted us all to be ninjas...easier said than done. There are NO ninja girl costumes, I wonder why! :) So, we ended up all being ninjas...except Bo, he was a ninja monkey, and Gracie a strawberry. :) HAHA
We definitely had fun and thats all that matters.

A Halloween Parade

2010-10-30T00:55:00.000-07:00

"He shall feed HIs flock like a shepherd: He shall gather the lambs with his arm."
-Isaiah 40:11

Our little ninja had a parade at school today!

Her new trick!

2010-10-25T14:20:00.000-07:00

September

2010-09-28T19:33:00.000-07:00

Here are a few fun things that happened this month!
Gavin started Preschool! He absolutely loves it. And the hug that comes along with "Mommy" as he runs towards me at the end of the day is the best part. Well...the break is nice too. :) Its funny how school has changed him. He is more disciplined and gets it when he has to wait his turn! So nice.

We bid farewell to Scotty. He is off to begin college life at Cal Poly San Luis Obispo. We are so thrilled for him but will miss him terribly. We will miss hearing the piano and constant ukulele playing and Gavin will miss his favorite playmate!

Dinner with The Young fam! We met to celebrate G-pops & Uncle Sean's birthdays. Dinner was so great, but the bowling afterwards was even better! We love our family so much!!!

My poor mom has been having health problems for 2 years now. This week was especially tough with 2 trips to the ER. We were so glad that she was ok and wanted to just spend some time with her and show her we love her. We tried to make it relaxing as possible. Gavin and I made Oatmeal cookies and served them on the "good" dishes. Gavin and Nanny played Where's Waldo around the house for about an hour! It was so much fun! We love you Nana!

This is Gavin on Picture day, Grace with her favorite toy right now, and Bo with his beautiful new smiles!!

I also came across my new 'life verse'...

Underneath are the Everlasting Arms.
Duet. 33:27B

Thank you Lord for an amazing month.

My turn

2010-09-15T23:37:00.000-07:00

So today was one of those days where It felt like I took care of everyone but myself. If your a mom, I'm sure most days feel like that...today was especially draining. So hear I am, its 11pm and I'm having a pity party. I'm racking my brain as to how I could've done this day 'better', how I could've taken care of myself along the way. So I'm tired and in my pity party I say, "So who is supposed to take care of me? When is it my turn?"
I know I sound 4...I mentioned pity party. yuk.
I need to unwind, so I grab the remotes, which happen to be resting on my bible. And I know that what I really need is my bible not the TV. So I decide to read a few verses before I unwind in front of the TV. :) ha
I open God's word and just like it promises...it always delivers, it grabs me. God grabs me and as I'm reading a Psalm, I'm humbled. I feel the embarrassing selfishness melt away. Nothing like talking to the God of the universe to give you a little perspective.
That song comes into my head...
I lift my eyes up to the mountains
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from You
Maker of heaven
Creator of the earth
Oh how I need you Lord
You are my only hope.
You're my only prayer.
So I will wait for you to come and rescue me
Come and give me life.

I bow my head and realize this is "my turn"
He is the one to take care of me.
101 verses flood my mind of all the promises God has made to love and take care of me.

Psalm 34:17
The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears,
And delivers them out of all their troubles.
The Lord is near to those that have a broken heart

Psalm 139:10
Even there Your hand shall lead me,
And Your right hand shall hold me.

Psalm 23:1-3
The Lord is my shepherd;
I shall not want.
He makes me to lie down in green pastures;
He leads me beside the still waters.
He restores my soul;

Thank you Lord. May I always run to You first to give me what I need, so that I can serve those you've given me.

P.S.
Thought these pics of Josh and the kids were too precious! What a great dad!

Christmas Portraits

2010-09-14T16:02:00.000-07:00

My business partner Becky and I are doing Christmas Portraits again this year! Last year was such a success and SO much fun that we couldn't wait to do it again!
Please pass on the news to anyone in the Orange County area!!!

REFER A FRIEND!

2 months old

2010-09-02T17:25:00.000-07:00

Psalm 92
4 For you make me glad by your deeds, O LORD;
I sing for joy at the works of your hands.

5 How great are your works, O LORD,
how profound your thoughts!

11.5 lbs 24.5 inches
A healthy and happier baby boy!

A fun day

2010-08-26T23:20:00.000-07:00

My friend Shanna rocked the playdate today. She is so creative. She showed up with fresh veggies & fruit for a paint playdate and the results were adorable. The kids had so much fun. Then after hours of laziness, mommy and the boys had a bowling date that Gavin had been anticipating & begging for for weeks! Nana stopped by too! What a treat. P.S. Tustin Lanes has Kids Rock N Bowl every Friday from 3-5pm for $8 including shoes. I think we'll try that next. :)

Fragile

2010-08-25T18:20:00.000-07:00

Ephesians 3:20&21 Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen.
Real life.

Well, today I was going to blog asking for prayer for Gracie's upcoming surgery. However, after a long appointment with the plastic surgeon, a decision was made that there will be no surgery right now. Apparently Gracie is not big enough for her cleft pallet surgery. It felt like a punch in the gut. This surgery is something we have been eagerly waiting for, but as the day drew closer I have to admit I wanted to take her and run. So, half relieved, I moved on to the next order of business. How do we grow her? You know, you take your child to check ups and no matter what happens you can always celebrate their growth and oh how exciting it is. When I heard that she gained only OUNCES in 3 months, I wanted to cry. Seriously...ounces?? It felt like we all got a big fat F on our report card. Except this F stood for Fragile...Grace's weight, Grace's eating, Grace's mommy. Fragile and helpless, I am quickly reminded that my God is not. This was not her time to have surgery. For some reason this wasn't best for her right now and thank God the surgeon was willing to step back and notice it.

So, this is how God works. And I love it. Needless to say, this was a hard afternoon. I made it home to Gavin, my mother-in-law had so graciously taken him 'back to school' shopping. Can you believe that? Anyway, I see her and burst into tears...I mean, I could not get it together. Randomly my neighbor drops by and offers to take Gavin for a little bit. I gladly say yes, and can't believe the timing. So, Josh quickly makes his way home from work, my mother-in-law feeds Grace, while I nurse Bo in tears. Not 2 minutes after Josh gets home, we get a knock at the door. Someone from our amazing new church(River 47) was at the door with a hot meal. My jaw hit the floor. So my mother-in-law scoots out the door, we put Grace to bed, Bo in the Bjorn, and we get a quiet dinner to ourselves...completely provided by my Jesus. He saw us and knew we were Fragile, and He met our needs.
It really felt like one little miracle after the next.

So, today, Grace got a new accessory. A pump. This will pump food into her tummy at night, while she sleeps, so we can get more calories into that little body. God is the only one who can grow her. I completely trust that He will and that her surgery will come at the perfect time. I praise Him already.

Cousin Camp

2010-08-25T16:36:00.000-07:00

Ephesians 3:19 ...to know the love of Christ which passes knowledge; that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.

Every summer we look forward to cousin camp. In fact this year Gavin said, "DaisyDylan&Isaac" so much I was beginning to think it was one word...one child. :) It was a fun week packed with activities and most of them revolving around water! This year the Goff 5 were down for 9 days!! We had pool days, went to Sea World & Legoland, & camped at Mission Bay in San Diego! Seriously...it was a blast! With a new one in tow...I have to be honest most days I felt about 3 steps behind. But, my family was incredibly gracious and helped me out so much. It was our one trip this season and it definitely made our Summer!! Well, this...and Bo! :)

Beautiful sisters.

Nana is in heaven...surrounded by her grandkids!

A cherished mommy moment! :)

Starla & Isaac

Daisy is clearly not into this ride! Ha

6-28-2010

2010-08-20T00:03:00.001-07:00

Genesis 16:11
The angel of the LORD also said to her:
"You are now with child
and you will have a son.

It was a moment I will never forget...
When my children came in to meet their new brother and our new family was together for the first time. I was in heaven! I can't describe the feeling...I literally wanted to jump out of bed, grab them all in my arms and dance. You must have crazy endorphins after giving birth. :) I thought I was going to burst...look at my face. Haha

the One who sees me

2010-08-19T22:33:00.000-07:00

Genesis 16: 13
She gave this name to the LORD who spoke to her: "You are the God who sees me," for she said, "I have now seen the One who sees me."

This verse describes exactly the conversation I've had with God this week. I'm nothing...but His. He sees me. I still can't fully grasp how the Alpha & Omega, Beginning and the End, First and Last, would care to see me and meet my needs but He does.
I can't begin to describe how blessed I have felt since Bo was born. God brought people...precious people to come along side us on this new journey called "3 kids". So here are some of our angels, our village, if you would:

My amazing mom ran errands, did laundry, watched Gavin, fed Grace, and a million and 1 other wonderful things including lots of hugs, love, and prayers.

My wonderful mother-in-law, Patsy, also fed Grace, played with Gavin, cleaned, and listened, loved, and prayed.

My precious friend, Christine, while home from school felt God leading her to offer her time to help friends in need this summer. Knowing that God put it on her heart to help ME brought me to tears. I am honored to have a friend in her and so blessed to be around a woman that loves Jesus like she does. The entire Babcock family blessed us tremendously.

My dear friends Sally & Joy each brought me my favorite treat, strawberries, in the hospital. They also came and took Gavin for playdates, offered up many prayers and called with encouraging words. I love these women.

Gaylynn is a woman I have looked up to for years. She follows and serves God with an amazing attitude. She lives it...really lives her faith. She encouraged me so much this day. She watched Gavin so I could take the babies to a Dr appointment. She made it a point to encourage me to fill my time at home with studies via pod casts. She brought tears to my eyes as she shared with me what God was teaching her. Im so grateful for the time she carved out for us.

These wonderful friends brought dinners & gifts & watched my kids so I could rest. They were incredibly thoughtful and I loved spending time with them.

Jessie gave Gavin private swim lessons for an entire week. Even on her birthday!!!

Super Dad!

There are so many more that I didn't have pictures of...but you know who you are...(Chrissy, I can't believe I don't have a picture of you from even 1 of our visits :(.)
Found a couple...

Josh's best friend (K-now), Brad & his wife Lauren had Nolan just 2 weeks before Bo! Thank you Lauren for the yummy oatmeal cookies! :)

One of my dearest friends, Chrissy & her son Cody came by with gifts for everyone. What a treat to spend the morning with you. Thank you for the constant calls & prayers! Love you.

My dear friend Clarice was down from NorCal to see Bo. :) This was my first night out for a girls night+Bo. It was a treat. Love you!

Thank you Jesus for seeing us. Thank you for your kids that served you by serving us.

Bo is 1 week old

2010-08-19T20:09:00.000-07:00

Job 33:4
The Spirit of God has made me;
the breath of the Almighty gives me life.

My friend and business partner shot these when Bo was a week old. What a blessing to have these images captured for us during such a precious time. Thanks Becky!! www.beckyfisherphotography.com

A beautiful addition

2010-08-19T18:08:00.000-07:00

I am so moved and so blessed to announce a beautiful new addition to our family...

His first name means life and his middle name joy and he has definitely brought both to our family.
This child is strong and healthy and though unplanned on our end, he was perfectly planned by the God of the universe and His timing is absolutely perfect.
I find myself taking nothing for granted...so blessed to have 3 beautiful, healthy children...all perfect gifts.
I am exhausted and frazzled almost constantly...3 kids is NO JOKE. :)
But the same God who provided continues to provide.

New every morning!

2010-06-03T11:25:00.000-07:00

Lamentations 3:22&23
22 Through the LORD’s mercies we are not consumed,
Because His compassions fail not.
23 They are new every morning;
Great is Your faithfulness.

Hallelujah!

2010-04-04T08:27:00.000-07:00

Then He said to them, “Thus it is written, and thus it was necessary for the Christ to suffer and to rise from the dead the third day, and that repentance and remission of sins should be preached in His name to all nations, beginning at Jerusalem. And you are witnesses of these things.
Luke 24:46-48

according to the eternal purpose which He accomplished in Christ Jesus our Lord, in whom we have boldness and access with confidence through faith in Him.
Ephesians 3:11-12

For this reason I bow my knees to the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ...
Ephesians 3:14

"Hallelujah! For our Lord God Almighty reigns."
Revelation 19:5-7

Happy 1st Birthday Grace!

2010-03-23T21:53:00.001-07:00

My gift
It was one year ago today that I received a most precious gift. A gift that has brought me immeasurable joy, endless hugs and giggles, and to my knees in prayer.
A doll
An angel
A precious gift of life
A girl

I stumble as I try to sum up this year and what this precious life means to me...words are inadequate.
She has changed me.

My year
Anticipation, excitement, initial joy, concern, struggle, panic, a rush to the hospital, a long stay, a diagnosis, sadness, a surgery, release...relief, home, family life begins, hope, joy, Dr's visits, therapy, prayer, a milestone met, laughter, sitting up, "Mama", teeth, giggles, playing with brother, "Dada", peek a boo, a gift, our gift.

My Grace
I love...
that she smiles with her whole face
the way she looks at me
when she buries her face on my shoulder
when she lifts her arms to be held
when she talks to me
the way her face lights up when she sees daddy
when she does something she is proud of
when she laughs at Gavin
her hair
her four silly teeth
that I see Jesus' craftsmanship in her
that she lights up my day with an instant smile every morning
what she adds to our family
her chubby little legs
her happiness
that I get to be her mommy

Happy First Birthday Gracie Goo!!!!!

Happy 4th Birthday Gavin!!

2010-03-09T08:21:00.000-08:00

This morning we couldn't wait to wake Gavin up to celebrate his 4th birthday. I'm surprisingly emotional thinking about how much joy this child has brought into our lives. He is fun, witty, tall, adorable, loves to run, energetic, loving, kind, thoughtful, and smart like his daddy. I could go on and on. As a mom, I am so grateful that Jesus gave me such a wonderful child. I am so blessed to get to be around him everyday. Besides he makes me laugh constantly!
This morning we opened the door to find a box of donuts with a cluster of balloons and a card with a link to Gavin's special birthday song. Just this morning I was thinking about how Patsy always played a special birthday song for her boys every year and how we should do that for Gavin. But what would his song be??? Well, here was our answer. We laughed so hard we cried. This is one of Gavin's best friends singing a birthday song that she made up all by herself. Hang on, it gets really good!
It is so wonderful to have friends that love and celebrate our son like we do! :)

Love you!!

Our work in progress

2010-02-24T08:56:00.000-08:00

Someday I plan to print and bind this blog into a photo album. So not only is this a great outlet for me, a way to connect with friends and family, it's also my form of scrap booking. :) So these pictures might only be for me eventually...but I thought I would share since we posted before pictures of our house last year.
We still have a million projects we want to do and things aren't quite finished...but let's face it...it will always be like that. We love where we live, feel so blessed, and everyday we enjoy what God has given to us.

Here is the bathroom we worked on this week and are close to finishing...

Our living space

I love how Gavin is playing with Grace in this picture.

Daddy in the kitchen!

An all day bike ride!

2010-02-21T15:52:00.000-08:00

This Saturday we had ABSOLUTELY nothing planned! Hallelujah! It was so much fun to wake up and wonder what was in store. So here it goes...
9:30am-We decide a bike ride would be perfect. The weather is absolutely gorgeous and a chance for Gavin to get his wiggles out makes it the perfect family activity.
11:00am-We realize there is no way Grace is going to fit in the bike seat we have...she is WAY too small.
1pm-Josh and Gavin are back from Chino Hills picking up a bike trailer for Grace (and eventually baby boy). Thank you Craigslist! We quickly realize a nap is going to be crucial for a successful bike ride.
3:30pm-Nap time is over and its time to get ready.
4:30pm-We are finally off on our bike ride. I smile the whole time. Watching our family "bike train" make it slowly down the tracks is just too cute to me. After breaking down and yelling, "Just peddle" a few times we happily make it to Nannie's house.
Just in time for dinner!

Our protector

2010-02-11T16:31:00.000-08:00

So, we had an amazing day at bible study today, we made it home early, all had a nap, and then Grace began to have a really hard time.
She has been struggling the last month and a half with these horrible bouts of constipation. It is horrible. She just bawls unconsolable because she is in so much pain. We have tried and tried, with a Dr's supervision to keep her regular with no success. It is so hard as a parent to watch your child go through something so painful and not be able to do much. I rubbed her back and rocked her through it, and she finally caught a break. I finished feeding her and as soon as I picked her up she threw up everything she just ate. I started to cry. For the first time in a while I felt completely inadequate to take care of her. "Lord, what am I doing wrong?", I thought, "How do I care for her?" Just then Gavin dropped a little box filled with bible verses all over the floor. He quickly said, "Mommy will you read these bible verses to me?"
Of course. Of course a box of bible verses just fell and you want me to read them to you. Of course.
It was a divine appointment.
After reading through quite a few, I was comforted, so encouraged, so reminded of God's love, His constant presence, and His desire to take us under His wing.
So, together we walked back over to Grace and Gavin said, "Don't worry mommy, God is protecting Gracie."

It was the sweetest moment. God just spoke through my precious little boy, to remind me that He is her protector.

I find it funny that my post just days ago was about God's faithfulness and how He calls us not to worry...Thank you Lord for the quick reminder.

It's a BOY!!!!

2010-02-10T07:30:00.001-08:00

We are proud to announce that we are welcoming a new member into the Young family. I am pregnant with baby #3-a BOY! I am 20 weeks along and due June 25th(Mimi Patsy's birthday)! We are thrilled. Gracie and her little brother will be a whopping 15 months apart. I've met many people that say it can be done...so I'm counting on that! :)
I think God will remain faithful, as He always has, to provide us exactly what we need to raise 3 kids!
We are so blessed and excited to share this with all of you, our friends and family!! Please keep our baby boy in your prayers!

Orphan runner

2010-02-07T23:13:00.000-08:00

I'm so proud of my dear friend Sally!! She ran an incredible race today at the HB Marathon. She finished in 9th overall and 2nd in her age group with a time of 3:18. The amazing thing about Sally is that she uses every ounce of her being to serve the Lord and today's race was no exception. She radiated joy as she ran, doing exactly what God created her to do, among other things. She is incredibly gifted, works incredibly hard, and loves and encourages others along the way. Thanks for always being such a godly example to me friend!!

Please visit her site!!
just copy and paste this to access it.
http://members.shaohannahshope.org/site/TR/Events/runninghope?pxfid=1940&fr_id=1000&pg=fund

Don't worry

2010-02-05T12:37:00.000-08:00

Luke 12: 22-29
22 Then He said to His disciples, “Therefore I say to you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; nor about the body, what you will put on. 23 Life is more than food, and the body is more than clothing.
24 Consider the ravens, for they neither sow nor reap, which have neither storehouse nor barn; and God feeds them. Of how much more value are you than the birds?
25 And which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature?
26 If you then are not able to do the least, why are you anxious for the rest?
27 Consider the lilies, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin; and yet I say to you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. 28 If then God so clothes the grass, which today is in the field and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, how much more will He clothe you, O you of little faith?
29 “And do not seek what you should eat or what you should drink, nor have an anxious mind. 30 For all these things the nations of the world seek after, and your Father knows that you need these things.
31 But seek the kingdom of God, and all these things shall be added to you.

This encouraged me so much this week. Do we not know that our Creator understands His creation? He knows our struggles and our fears. Jesus is so gentle and gives us such a beautiful word picture to help us remember His faithfulness. So whenever you look out at the birds or blooms remember how much more valuable you are to God and put your trust in the One who created you and values you.

(artwork by my uncle, the late Tom Cash)

Growing

2010-02-05T12:22:00.000-08:00

I can see such a change in my kids these last few weeks. They are growing up before my very eyes. Grace is sitting up on her own, clapping, fake laughing, waving, saying MAmmma, and other yummy sounds like that. She is almost 10 1/2 months and is an absolute joy...such a happy, sweet, little girl. Gavin will be 4 next month and is wonderfully active and so much fun. TOTAL BOY! We love that. We are so blessed to have one of each!
Here are some recent pics of our precious kiddos...

December

2010-02-05T11:07:00.000-08:00

This was the strangest December we have had thus far. The kids and I came down with H1N1 and seemed to be stuck home forever. We did get a few fun things in at the beginning of the month before we fell off the face of the earth! Here are some pictures of the kids having fun in various Christmas activities!

I can't bow low enough

2009-12-07T18:35:00.000-08:00

Well, our sweet Grace made it through both surgeries and is doing extremely well. She is like a new little woman...she can hear and is sporting a new tummy accessory.
I had a dear friend remind me of Psalm 23. While Grace was in surgery and I was in the waiting room I kept reciting it over and over and was struck by the end of the passage:
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me
All the days of my life;
That is exactly what has happened. It seems that no matter what we have experienced or gone through as a family, God's goodness and mercy have always followed us. And to that I am so incredibly grateful.

The song Cielo by Phil Wickham has meant so much this week and captures exactly how I feel when it comes to praising God for all that He is and all that He has done...
I can't sing loud enough
I can't bow low enough
I can't reach high enough

Thank you Lord!

Surgery #2 this week!!

2009-12-07T09:05:00.000-08:00

Well, we are off to surgery #2 at CHOC this morning. Grace is getting a new tubby tube, called a Mickey button. This will be much smaller than the tube she has now and much cleaner! Yay!
So, again, if we may ask, would you please pray for our little Gracie as she has to go under anesthesia again and have surgery on her tummy. Josh is working, Gavin is with Mimi and I'll be there with her in the hospital. Please pray for peace.
THANK YOU! How beautiful is the body of Christ?! To join together and lift up little Gracie in prayer before the Lord.
Love you!

Grace update

2009-12-02T17:43:00.001-08:00

The surgery was a success! Thank you for all of your prayers!
We definitely felt them. Gracie couldn't eat before the surgery(8 hrs total), so when the Dr was 2 hours late, I started hoping that God would give her strength to get through it. What's neat is that the staff was so impressed that she was so happy and smiley that we got to share that there were a ton of people praying for her and that God was giving her His peace. They all agreed. :) One of the nurses also shared that because the surgery was pushed back Grace ended up getting the best Anesthesiologist in the hospital. God is so good! The Dr. let me go in with her while they put her under, which was an amazing privilege. So, I got to hold her hand and be with her. She had her eyes locked on me, so I was so glad I was there. She was a champ, a little groggy/sad after surgery, but recovered really quickly. They discovered that she had two severe inner ear infections, which we are now giving her antibiotics for. It amazes me, how happy she has been while having 2 ear infections...unbelievable. It was at home around the dinner table that we noticed her darting her head back and forth looking at each of us when we spoke, with eyes wide open, like she was hearing us for the first time. It was emotional and really precious. We are so blessed and so excited for our little girl to hear fully!

Thank you, thank you for your prayers and for loving our little Grace!! All Glory goes to God!!

Surgery tomorrow

2009-11-30T22:06:00.000-08:00

Hello sweet friends and family! It has been a whopping 1 1/2 months since my last blog...that's because it's Christmas portrait season and these fingers have been editing away! :)
Thank you for your continued love and support. I've gotten many inquiries on how the kids are doing. So, I'll take this moment to catch you up really quick.
Gracie is 8 months old! I know, can you believe it? She is 13 lbs 12oz and 25 inches long. She is so happy and is definitely getting an opinion. We love it.
She is headed in to surgery tomorrow, her first since leaving CHOC 6 months ago. She is getting ear tubes placed. It's a little bigger deal when its an 8 month old getting them, so she will be admitted to the hospital for the day, with surgery at 12. She has really narrow ear canals so we are just praying that that doesn't allow for any complications. The most exciting part of all of this is that she is going to hear after this, Lord willing. We can't wait to see what a difference this makes in her little development...speech, and otherwise.
We are so proud of our little girl and feel so blessed to get to have her as our daughter. She is one of the best things that has happened to us!!
The other best thing...Gavin is 3 1/2 and a whopping 42 lbs. He is a giant and really seems to have just grown into a little boy these past few weeks. He is a cuddler and I am totally taking advantage of that while I can. He has an encouragers heart and is starting to love to do things on his own to help out around the house. He is so funny and is constantly keeping us all laughing.

Tonight Josh had both his babies on his lap reading stories and every time he spoke in the little bird voice, he came up with, Gracie would just crack up. So overhearing giggles and silly voices I grabbed the camera. My kids are so blessed to get the best dad in the world. They just adore him and so do I!
Thank you Lord, I am overwhelmed with your blessings today!

Love you all and we are so grateful for your prayers for Grace tomorrow!

One world government

2009-10-19T06:47:00.000-07:00

I studied Revelation for a full year, 2 years ago and it completely changed my life. I couldn't be the same "Christian" or person as I was before studying it, nor did I want to be. Revelation became so much more than a "scary" book that I avoided. It became a book of God revealing Himself to me. I learned of God's Sovereignty, His plan, His grace, and that He is coming back SO soon.
That being said, I am not an expert, by any means, just a child looking forward to her Dad's return.
Due to biblical prophecy being fulfilled in recent decades, we have all heard that these are the "last days", the days before Christ returns for His church. Yet, many of us have grown weary. The thing is, these last few years seem to be moving through bible prophecy at warp speed.
I saw this last night on YouTube and was reminded of how close we are.
I don't care how you feel about global warming...it doesn't matter how we get there...it's just that we are there.
John 14:1-3
1"Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God[a]; trust also in me. 2In my Father's house are many mansions; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. 3And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am.
Copy the link below and paste into your web browser...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PMe5dOgbu40&feature=email

By Jerome R. Corsi

A former science adviser to British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher says the real purpose of the United Nations Climate Change Conference in Copenhagen on Dec. 7-18 is to use global warming hype as a pretext to lay the foundation for a one-world government.

"At [the 2009 United Nations Climate Change Conference in] Copenhagen this December, weeks away, a treaty will be signed," Monckton told a Minnesota Free Market Institute audience on Thursday at Bethel University in St. Paul.

"Your president will sign it. Most of the Third World countries will sign it, because they think they're going to get money out of it. Most of the left-wing regimes from the European Union will rubber stamp it. Virtually nobody won't sign it," he told the audience of some 700 attendees.

"I read that treaty and what it says is this: that a world government is going to be created. The word 'government' actually appears as the first of three purposes of the new entity.

"The second purpose is the transfer of wealth from the countries of the West to Third World countries, in satisfaction of what is called, coyly, 'climate debt' – because we've been burning CO2 and they haven't. We've been screwing up the climate and they haven't. And the third purpose of this new entity, this government is enforcement."

http://bible-prophecy-today.blogspot.com

Gracie is 6 months old!!

2009-10-05T22:43:00.000-07:00

My precious little girl is 6 months old!! She loves to smile and kick her feet down hard, she is just fitting into her NB shoes, she LOVES laughing at her big brother Gavin, and is completely her mothers' pride and joy.
The picture of me holding her on the wood fence, while she tugs at the leaf made me cry the first second I saw it on my camera screen. I felt it perfectly captured how proud I am of her and I hope she can always see that in my eyes.

I decided to take her 6 month pictures at an apple grove in Oak Glen! My FAVORITE Fall tradition is apple picking and I have tons of memories of picking apples with friends and family in Oak Glen, every year.
The day was full of adventure. Though, sometimes a little rough, ie. the 1 1/2 hour detour and the hornet sting, laughter seemed to be the main theme of the day. We had so much fun. It was just my mom ( Can you believe how beautiful she is?), me, and the kids.
The weather was gorgeous and Gavin had a blast! Yay! That's all that matters.
I can't believe how many pics I was able to get with my kids(Thanks Mom!).
I loved this day, and it really was this picturesque. Thank you Lord!

He will wipe every tear from their eyes.

2009-09-30T07:52:00.000-07:00

I received really sad news today. I was at bootcamp with Jen, a member of the development team at CHOC and a good friend, and she told me that one of the babies that was in the NICU with Gracie just died. It instantly broke my heart and made me cry. Little Savannah wasn't just there at the same time. She was Gracie's little neighbor, she stayed right across the hall, and she had the most beautiful smile. When you live at the NICU, you become very close with your neighbors. This little girl had a really hard time and I remember praying for her and her sweet parents because I couldn't believe all that little Savannah needed. I remember all the love that the CHOC team gave to Savannah, and I watched them celebrate her little achievements. She had been in the NICU for 9 months and was so bored with her surroundings (can you imagine?). So, the nurses, would take her on walks around the floor and wheel her around on her little wagon. She was the sweetest little girl and I'm so glad we knew her and her amazing family.
I have to admit it instantly made me SO incredibly grateful for my time with my kids and especially little Gracie. God has been so good to us. He is so faithful and He heard my cry for Grace. I am so grateful for the amazing medical community at CHOC and so grateful for Gracie's continued care and monitoring.
The beautiful thing is that this baby is now with Jesus in heaven, & has a new body, with no more pain, no more struggle.
Revelation 21:3-5
He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.

Please pray for little Savannah's family today, while they celebrate her short life at the memorial service today.

BFP + Shelly Young Photography= Christmas cards on time this year!!

2009-09-23T21:01:00.000-07:00

This year for my Christmas shoots, I will be working with my dear friend and business partner, Becky Fisher. We will be shooting for 3 days at 3 different locations: BEACH (Newport), PARK (Central Park, HB) and STUDIO (Tustin). Spaces are already filling up, so if you'd like to sign up, please contact me at youngshell@gmail.com as soon as possible to reserve your sitting. BONUS: This year's shoots will include Christmas Cards + other goodies!

Celebrating Clarice!

2009-08-27T21:18:00.000-07:00

Amazing friends.
Amazing Day.
You know, I've heard it said that in a lifetime you could count the amount of true friends you've had on one hand...well, two of those slots are filled.
These two women, have made my life rich. We are so different and yet we love each other just as we are. We share honestly, we laugh, we cry, we play, we love!
This day was a day to celebrate Clarice. Clarice, my compassionate, kind, Clarice was one of my first friends at Calvary. I'll never forget she invited me to eat lunch with her and her friends and I loved her for that. We visited all of the old places we used to hang out, reminiscing, and laughing. Chrissy put together a soundtrack filled with Alannis, The Cranberry's, Journey, etc. It was awesome. Followed by...Wahoos, 56th st, and a little shopping at Crystal Court!

Sweet August

2009-08-27T11:35:00.000-07:00

August! Sweet August has been a great month. Not just because of the warm sunshine and massive amounts of pool time, but because I used August as a "Revamp my priorities month". I stepped back and reevaluated. I wish I could go into every detail of how God guided me through this month, but here is a quick overview...
I played with my kids.
I stacked legos on top of one another at random, without over thinking a design.
I was silly, and laughed.
I surrounded myself with things that make me happy, and minimized things that emotionally drained me.
I said no to events and play dates and didn't apologize.
I made time for people I wouldn't normally give a second glance.
I read my bible.
I enjoyed photography.
I danced.
I listened to God and witnessed his direction.
I took naps and went to bed on time.
I went on dates with my husband
I exercised...hard!

You know, living purposefully has been hard work and I realize it is going to be a daily process. But, I have to say that this month has made me feel alive again, and I've felt more myself than I have in months! Thank you Lord!
It is no coincidence that this decision is coinciding with my 30th birthday, coming up in October. I learned so much in my 20's and now I'm really looking forward to living a healthy, purposeful life in my 30's!!!
Bring em on!!!

5 months old!

2009-08-24T14:21:00.001-07:00

Gracie is 5 months old!! She is happy and healthy. Still eating ok, but gaining weight and growing long! :) She is completely entertained by her brother, laughs, and is chatting up a storm. Ever since we left the hospital we had the expectation of Gracie's big 5 month appointment. The appointment where she meets with 10 specialists in one afternoon. After the appointment all 10 of the Dr's. reconvene and discuss Gracie and a plan of action. It's AMAZING!!! It seemed so far off and I could only imagine how big Gracie would be and how she would be developing. I can't believe it's here. In fact now that it's here, I'm thinking wait...does this mean surgeries are looming...uh oh, maybe I'm not ready for this.
I'm so glad she is in the God's hands and my arms. :)
I love you my sweet little Gracie!

Compassion

2009-08-21T13:07:00.000-07:00

Where is the compassion?
Are we not all fellow travelers in this life? Are we not all students, are we not all seekers, are we not all discovering, learning, growing? Don't we all feel lonely sometimes, lost sometimes, vulnerable sometimes? Weren't we all "There" at some point in our life? A low point. An expectation unmet. Aren't we all at this stage in our life, for the first time?

Where is the grace?
Haven't we all made mistakes? Said the wrong thing. Done the wrong thing. Felt the wrong thing.

Where is the gentleness?
Aren't we fragile? We crack and scratch easily.

Where is the patience?
Aren't we all exhausted and behind sometimes?

Where is the Peace?
The only place I've ever experienced true peace is with Jesus. Period.

He ALONE can offer all of these things because He IS these things.
Jesus has compassion...
Matthew 9:36
When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep
without a shepherd.

Jesus shows Grace...
John 1:16
From the fullness of his grace we have all received one blessing after another.

Jesus is gentle...
Matthew 11:29
Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.

Jesus is patient...
1 Thessalonians 5:14
And we urge you, brothers, warn those who are idle, encourage the timid, help the weak, be patient with everyone.

Jesus is Peace...
John 14:27
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives.

We are just here to REFLECT his compassion, grace, gentleness, patience, and peace to one another!!

So let's START right now!

Let's LOVE those around us.
Let's Smile and offer a hand.
Let's listen.
Let's effect someone's life for the better.
Let's give and not take.
Let's encourage one another.

Thank you Lord for these gifts that you gave us, gifts that we can in turn give to each other.

Priscilla Ahn Dream

2009-08-06T00:10:00.000-07:00

I think this is beautiful...

I was a little girl alone in my little world who dreamed of a little home for me.
I played pretend between the trees, and fed my houseguests bark and leaves, and laughed in my pretty bed of green.

I had a dream
That I could fly from the highest swing.
I had a dream.

Long walks in the dark through woods grown behind the park, I asked God who I'm supposed to be.
The stars smiled down on me, God answered in silent reverie. I said a prayer and fell asleep.

I had a dream
That I could fly from the highest tree.
I had a dream.

Now I'm old and feeling grey. I don't know what's left to say about this life I'm willing to leave.
I lived it full and I lived it well, there's many tales I've lived to tell. I'm ready now, I'm ready now, I'm ready now to fly from the highest wing.

I had a dream

The Bruins Fan!

2009-08-05T23:54:00.000-07:00

My husband, as you may well know, is a HUGE fan of UCLA football...Huge. He is also an avid reader and secretly loves writing. May I say, he is really good? He is. For weeks, maybe months, now he has been writing and www.bruinsnation.com has been publishing his work on their home page, over and over, now. His alias is captainqtp (Captain Q-tip...from a nick name in highschool referring to his white, blonde hair.) I have to brag for him, because he would never mention it...thought you might enjoy!
www.bruinsnation.com

Summer Fun!

2009-08-04T12:15:00.000-07:00

The Babcocks are our long time amazing family friends. They all made it over for a BBQ followed by Settlers of Catan. It was so much fun...I think we got them hooked, especially Christine! :)
Gavin also had his very first Preschool event...a meet and greet at Peppertree park, Daddy and Christine came too!
The kids are so cute and Gavin had so much fun...the funny thing was, Gavin was a head taller than all of them. :)
School starts in September! Yay!!

The Donally's visit!

2009-08-04T10:22:00.000-07:00

Cousin Camp 2009!!!

2009-08-04T10:19:00.000-07:00

Technically our first annual "Cousin Camp" ensued this month. Nana and Poppy hosted and what a blast we had!! It was a whirlwind 4 days, filled with Disneyland, pool, tie dye, pool, a luau, more pool, oh and a 20 year reunion for Starla!! Gavin loved seeing and playing with his ,much tanner, cousins...Gavin and Isaac were inseparable. We love our family and wish we could see them more often! We love you Goff family!

16 weeks old!

2009-07-15T09:52:00.000-07:00

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Man, its been a long time since my last post. It has been a crazy couple of weeks. Our sweet little Gracie is 16 weeks old! She weighs 9 lbs 6oz's and is 22 inches long. She loves, loves to play with Gavin. She laughs at everything he does!!! It's incredible to watch how close they are becoming. He only says the sweetest things to her and is so delicate and kind with her. All along we've thought, wow, he has really adjusted well to her. Then the other day, Patsy and I took him and Grace to the mall and after allowing and watching Gavin play on the patio at Nordstrom Cafe. A man walked out and said that Gavin said his mommy wasn't watching him because she was only paying attention to his little sister now. Yah!!! I almost died. I went in to the ugly laugh...so funny that he was playing the poor me card with a complete stranger. We were laughing so hard. :) I love that kiddo.
We went to the Lagoon with the Babcocks today. Gracie got to sport her first bathing suit. So cute(thanks mom)! Gavin had a blast on the water slides!

3 months old

2009-06-30T13:10:00.000-07:00

Psalm 37:4
"Delight yourself in the Lord; and He will give you the desires of your heart."

Grace Lily is now 3 months old. She is 9 lbs and 21" long. She started rolling over about a week ago. you know the kind of gravity roll...like, oh if i turn my head this way, my whole body goes over, cool! She loves to do it over and over. Lately, her favorite past time is sucking on her hands while observing the craziness that is Gavin! She adores the men in her life. She could watch Gavin all day and when Daddy walks in the room forget about it! She is such a joy to be around, I mean, a really good baby and a good sleeper too! She communicates by looking at us and whining with different voice inflections...it's hillarious. We love our precious girl to pieces! I just hope we get past this spit up phase. Yuk.
Gracie saw an Audiologist last week and her hearing test revealed that she does have fluid in her ears. The good news is that she has perfect hearing besides that. We are so relieved and so grateful. We had been praying ever since she failed her hearing test right before we left the NICU. It looks like she will definitely need tubes, and will probably get them in a couple months. We are just praying that the fluid doesn't do any damage in the mean time.
Isn't this time of year great? We look forward to the pool, bike rides, friends, BBQ's and all that is Summer. We will continue posting pics of our adventures!
Happy Summer!!!

Shelly Young Photography

2009-06-29T23:24:00.000-07:00

Check out new posts on my photography blog:

www.shellyyoungphotography.com

Have fun!!

Father's Day

2009-06-28T22:47:00.000-07:00

Well, we just so happen to have 5 wonderful Father's to celebrate on Father's Day. It called for a crazy day, but they are all worth it!
Father #1- God our Father. Thank you Lord for loving us unconditionally and teaching us what a father is.
Father #2- My wonderful husband, Josh. He is seriously one of the most amazing dad's. He is patient, a great teacher, and is SO much fun!! He is an amazing story teller and you would never know it, but the BIGGEST ham when it comes to entertaining his kids.

Father #3-My Pops, John. He loves me so much, and loves Josh and my kids. He also worked really hard so that I could attend a Christian school all of my life and I will be eternally grateful for his love and support. Gavin and Gracie love when Grandpa John stops by to play. We love you so much Dad!

Father #4-Guy, My Dad and technically my Father-in-law. He is such a kind and wonderful man. He loves to give and create time to be with his kids and family. I have known him now for 12 years and love him so much. In fact, so much that when I went to give him a hug on Father's day I slipped my hand in his shirt(on accident...and almost died of embarrassment! hehe :). Oh and he is a wonderful G-Pops to our kids.

Father #5-Jeff, my amazing step-father. He is so thoughtful and kind, always working hard to give of himself to his family. He makes a mean Tri-tip and loves stopping by the house with Max, while he is out on a run. We love him so much and of course, Gavin and Gracie love Poppy! :)

Our fun week!

2009-06-10T12:03:00.000-07:00

Psalm 9:1-2
I will praise You, O Lord, with my whole heart;
I will tell of all Your marvelous works.
I will sing praise to Your name, O Most High.

Exhausted, from being up all night with the kids I headed to Starbucks this morning one tired momma and came home an energetic woman, optimistic about my day! I didn't used to NEED coffee, but now it's amazing how coffee affects my personality. So... I'm ready to go!
Gracie is a whopping 8 lbs 5 ozs and looking plump! It's awesome! She starts occupational therapy (OT) on Thursday and we are so excited. The therapist comes to our house and works with Gracie for 1 hour a week. Yay! If the OT thinks its necessary she will also ask for Gracie to get PT as well. We'll see!
Gavin is sick today...bummer. At least we get to be home in our sweats all day!

Gracie practicing her Hip-Hop routine for So You Think You Can Dance 2027!

Feeding the ducks at the park.

Last night we went to the cutest thing ever...Pajama story time at the Orange library. A room full of kids in their PJs singing "Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes" is just too adorable. We met our friend Jen from the hospital there with her 2 (adorable) boys and husband. We had such a great time and loved making new friends. Their oldest is just about a month younger than Gavin and about the same height. They had so much fun together...all though all they wanted to do was play cars instead of listen to the stories.

Grandpa John stopped by earlier in the week. We love when he comes over to play. He got to cuddle Gracie and teach Gavin how to use his sling shot. This was a major bonus...getting him to stop shooting himself in the face with the ball. hehe
So our weekend was a little crazy. Probably the fullest days we've had since being home with Gracie. We had so much fun, but payed a little on Monday morning. :)
We went to cousin Mekaja's second birthday party. Everything was going smoothly, I was tube feeding Gracie and Josh was watching Gavin in the backyard. Josh turns away for one second ( you know how it is) and Splash Gavin falls in the pool, not knowing how to swim quite yet. All I hear is, "He's in the pool." and I know it's Gavin. I run, Gracie in hand and oh yes a syringe full of milk, hooked up to my child's tummy, to make sure Gav is ok. I find Josh in the pool, fully dressed, fishing him out (Blackberry in pocket). This happened about 10 minutes into being there. Poor Josh had to walk around in wet jeans for a good hour. :) We had fun seeing our fam and hated having to leave early.

So Sunday, we got to go to our friend Cody's first birthday. What a blast. Chrissy and Kevin's clubhouse park was perfect. Gavin and Josh ran and played the entire time while Gracie and I hung out in the shade chatting with friends...it was perfect (for me). hehe Thanks Rausch's for a fun party! We left the Rausch's and met Brad and Lauren at a pizza place to watch the Laker game. Trying to keep Gavin entertained was a chore. So once the game went in to overtime, Lauren and I took the kids to get yogurt while the guys stayed to watch the game. It was so good to hang out with friends and family and enjoy the gorgeous weekend.

I started going a little crazy the other day (maybe it had something to do with exhaustion), crying for no reason, worrying about anything and everything and I realized I hadn't been in God's word the past couple of days. Even Josh can tell the days I haven't spent time reading my bible. I am one of those people that just has to have my time with God to feel sane, to be reminded that He is in control, that He loves me, and loves my kids. The second my eyes are off of Him, I experience fear. It must be like Peter when he walked on the water with his eyes focused on Jesus(Matt. 14:25-33). But, the second his eyes focused on the wind and the waves, he started to sink. I think everything in this world is so loud, calling out for my attention, distracting my eyes and taking them off of Jesus. Instantly fear grips me and I start to fall. I'm so grateful that Jesus reaches out to me to grasp my hand and pull me out of the waves, causing me to fix my eyes on Him once again, restoring my joy and security.

Is it June already?

2009-06-03T13:32:00.000-07:00

We have our new door up! Yay!! Now...what to do...Stain or paint? Not sure.
Josh also rebuilt the bar to be a little sturdier so that when we have rowdy teenagers climbing on it, we don't have to worry! He really did an amazing job. Austin Hardwood is his new favorite store...he is like a kid in a candy shop! I love it.
I love the pics of Gavin holding Gracie after he just woke up from his nap. Don't you just love those sleepy blue eyes? Gracie is finally holding her head up. She is getting stronger everyday! Yay Grace!

A letter to my Grace

2009-06-02T16:45:00.000-07:00

Dear Grace,
I just had one of those moments with you that took my breath away. One of those moments where your mom learned love. A love that my heart can't contain so that tears just poured down my cheeks. You just spent about 30 minutes napping on my chest, wiggling and cuddling. You were so deeply asleep that when you started to stir it took a while to get those eyes peeled open. And when you did, a smile, you looked at me and smiled instantly. I love your beautiful smile. We cuddled and cooed and I started to cry. You see, I wasn't sure we were going to have these moments...these moments of not only recognition but adoring. I am so beyond grateful that my heart can't contain it. You are a gift. A perfect and precious gift to me and I am eternally grateful for moments like these. You are now on your mat, playing and kicking, smiling up a storm. I took about 30 pics of you having a ball and I had to write you a letter, because I felt like I would burst if I didn't get to tell you. To tell you how much I love you. I know you understand my love now, I just don't want to forget perfect moments like these with my amazing Grace.
I Love you sweetheart, Mommy

9 weeks old

2009-06-02T14:54:00.000-07:00

Well here we are with a 9 week old little Gracie. Can you believe it? I just left a Dr's appointment with the Geneticist at the Craniofacial clinic and I'm beaming. The Dr. was so positive. After seeing her she said, "Is this the same child?" She couldn't believe how healthy Gracie looked. She said if Gracie had looked this good when she first examined her in the hospital her decision to have her chromosomes tested would have been extremely difficult. She had only great things to say and man a little encouragement goes such a long way. I left so happy. :) I think it's human nature to want people to gush over your baby. But when the Dr. who is paying close attention to your child's chromosome abnormality does it...now that's saying something. :) hehe
Friday we meet with the Regional center and they will determine the kind of treatment that she will get and set goals for her. So please pray that this goes well and that God places her exactly where she needs to be. This meeting will determine whether she gets Physical therapy, Occupational therapy, or both. She also goes in for a hearing test on the 22nd and we are really praying that this goes well. 95% of kids with Cleft pallet have to get tubes placed because of the fluid build up in the ears. Gracie has passed her initial test in the hospital and then failed a second. This could mean that its just fluid build up or that there is something else wrong. Who knows. We will just pray and cross that bridge when we get there.
Thank you for your continued prayers. We are so proud of our little girl and secretly I love that I've gotten to hold a teeny tiny 7lber for a couple months now...but don't tell anyone. :)

Things I love:

2009-05-29T23:57:00.001-07:00

Watching my son play with reckless abandon
My little girl asleep on my chest
My husbands voice and embrace
This feeling of closeness with my Savior
My mom and my family
This neighborhood
Crawling into bed at night and back in at 5am
Building a life with my husband...looking at him and knowing that its him and me, in this together...
creating something so priceless
Talking with my girlfriends
The rain last night

A walk to the park

2009-05-29T18:10:00.001-07:00

I rented a couple cool lenses for a wedding I shot last weekend. Of course I had to break them in a little... ;)So I forced myself to take a few pics of the fam on the way to the park on Sat! It was so much fun feeling creative again! Man I love good lenses. :)

2 Months old.

2009-05-23T15:22:00.000-07:00

Psalm 68:19
Blessed be the Lord
Who daily loads us with benefits!

Among Gracie's many appointments this week was her 2 month check up. She is doing great! She now weighs 7lbs 6.5 oz's is 19 1/2" long and her head is 14.5". Yay Gracie. I know that is tiny, but she gained a pound in two weeks which is exactly what they would expect a baby to do! Yay. Just like any parent you compare the "stats" if you will, of your children and with ours it has been especially fun because they are on opposite ends of the spectrum. To put things in perspective Gavin was 7lbs, 21" at birth. The picture of their footprints says it all. They were both one week old when we did those prints and Gracie's is like 1/2 the size. :) Gavin was always in the 90 percentile and Gracie is in the 0 percentile...so funny. :) It reminds me of that old hymn:
All things bright and beautiful
All creatures great and small
All things wise and wonderful
The Lord God made them all.

Gavin is our little comedian lately. I mean he makes me laugh constantly. From asking me if his ankle was his foot's stomach to telling me that I'm not a bad mom. :) He is definitely a little stinker(as I'm writing this he threw a DVD up in the air and it landed on top of our armoire while running around in only underwear.) hehe

My mom and Jeff hired a friend to help us finish some of our unfinished projects around the house. It has been so wonderful and we are unbelievably grateful. So, Josh and Matt installed our new front door. Those of you that have been over may of noticed the old one that was half painted and had a hole punched into the back. The new one is so nice and what a difference it made. Next...it's on to the baseboards. :)
We finally started having play dates again and it is so much fun seeing this house lively and crawling with toddlers. A far cry from the night we came home to an empty house, with Gracie in the hospital and Gavin at my mom's. We love it. That's what this house was intended for. :)
We are having a blast with our precious little girl and our big 3 year old boy. We are loving this time in our lives and so grateful for the joy they bring us.
Come over soon!! ;)

Big Brother

2009-05-23T00:22:00.000-07:00

So today Momma went back to work...I had a quick photo shoot and came home to find out that my son, my adorable sweet son that has been nothing but precious with our little girl, did the unthinkable. Ok, so maybe thinkable for a 3 year old little boy. :)
Josh had let Gavin hold Gracie and while holding her, he started picking his nose and without thinking twice, wiped it on her head. Yep, wiped a boogie on his little sis. That's my boy!!! I laugh every time I think about it. Josh said it was the funniest thing he has ever seen. It kills me that I missed it. :)

Glorious life!

2009-05-21T12:13:00.000-07:00

Life is so much fun right now. We are brilliantly exhausted and loving our kids. Gracie has gained more weight and is eating even more. In fact she is eating so much during the day now, that we were able to let her miss a feeding last night. We all got to sleep! Yay! She is now 6lbs 12oz!
Daddy got our garage organized so he can finish some undone projects around the house. He is very giddy about the whole thing...as you can tell. What is it about a man and his garage...my dad and his dad are the same way? So cute. I guess I can liken it to my obsession with dishes. :)
Gavin got to play with the neighbor kids last night. It was so adorable to watch. He hated it when we had to call him in. I remember that was my favorite thing to do as a kid...play with the neighborhood kids until I got called in for bath time. I love these wonderfully long days, it reminds me Summer is almost here and I'm sure many more late afternoons with the neighborhood kids.
The amazing painting that you see was a gift from G-Pops and Mimi. They bought it at an art show to benefit Cherise's mission trip. We love it!
We are so blessed...it's ridiculous. Thank you Lord!

Today I went to the grocery store and kept everyone alive!

2009-05-18T16:30:00.000-07:00

...That's something right? hehe

GRACIE LOVES BEING HOME!!

2009-05-18T16:27:00.000-07:00

Ephesians 3:14-20
For this reason I kneel before the Father, I pray that out of his glorious riches He may strengthen you with power through His Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.
Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us.

We are home and I feel this verse captures it perfectly...He has done more than we could have imagined, or asked! We are home with our kids and it is absolutely heaven! The first day I walked around with a smile on my face the entire day. It was Mother's day and I was home with my two beautiful kids, what more could I ask for. The family came to our house to accommodate us and I just got to relax and enjoy being home. Thanks moms!
Gracie is LOVING it. She is looking so much healthier. I didn't realize until I looked back at the hospital pics, just how gaunt and sickly she looked. She is getting those adorable chubby little thighs and a full face. It is wonderful. Last she weighed, she was 6lbs 5 oz. That is a gain of 1 pound for the entire month in the hospital and 5 oz's in just a couple of days at home. She is showing us she is hungry more(that means crying) and taking more and more by bottle. The best part about being home is seeing her so lively. She just lights up with all of the craziness going on. She loves being in the middle of things and loves, loves her dad. She is smiling at us and connecting with us...something we pleaded with God for and can't believe how incredible it is. I'll admit she is a little spoiled and wants to be held at all times...but honestly, is this a problem? NO way...we don't mind it at all. :)
Thank you, thank you for praying us home. We love you friends and family and can't wait to start having you over to meet our little one. Ok, maybe give me one more week to settle in. :)
Oh the "I love mommy" cake was the gift Gavin wanted to get me for mother's day and then couldn't help but dive into it himself...adorable! He said, "I'm sorry about that mommy, I'm sorry about that." I've never laughed so hard. So precious! :)