Strong

Our strong child. Strong since before you were born...even kicking the doctor on the way out and pulling a baby handful of my hair out when they layed you on my chest. :) Though startled, you captured my heart. You perplex me, and yet I adore the sweet way about you.
Bo Radman Young is 9 months old and now has a drooly, toothy grin, loves to kneel on one knee and practicly stand on the other leg and balance. He follows me around and climbs up my leg whenever I stop. :) Today, he crawled up to me with a muddy grin and spit out a rock at my feet. no joke. So much for free reign while we all play outside.
I am so proud of him and pray that God becomes his strength. That his relationship with God would sustain him and give him peace and rest. I pray that his intense nature would be focused on furthing God's kingdom, by loving others. I pray his passion would be contagious and his strength would only be in and through Christ.

1 Kings 2:2
...be strong, therefore, and prove yourself a man. And keep the charge of the LORD your God: to walk in His ways, to keep His statutes, His commandments, His judgments, and His testimonies, as it is written in the Law of Moses, that you may prosper in all that you do and wherever you turn;
Joshua 1:7
Only be strong and very courageous, that you may observe to do according to all the law which Moses My servant commanded you; do not turn from it to the right hand or to the left, that you may prosper wherever you go.

1 Samuel 4:9
Be strong and conduct yourselves like men.

Come inside and rest

After the news this week, I have definitely been a little mushier with my momma. I'm eager to receive her calls, I appreciate her voice, thoughts, time...everything.
So, the other day I got a call from her. I paused seeing her picture on my phone as it rang. I thought what if I never saw that picture again. What if I didn't get a call from her everyday?
We talk and she asks if she can stop by in a couple minutes. A little excited, I said, "Yes, comeover!" We hang up and I busy myself tidying a few things. Making it pretty for her. She likes pretty. I move the flowers just right and pick up the toys strewn all over the living room. I put a kettle of hot water on, for tea. I start dishing out a little strawberry shortcake on the pretty plates. She likes pretty. I want to make it pretty for her. I turn on some music. The atmosphere is set, she will like this. I want her to feel relaxed when she comes in. I want her to sit and stay a while. The babies are sleeping, we won't have any distractions. I eagerly await her arrival and I look out the window of my front door and think she should be here by now.
I see her. Yay. She's here.
Oh, she's talking to someone on her phone, in the car. She'll be a minute.
I decide to watch her. Tears start pouring down my face as I stare, unbeknownst to her. I appreciate her hand gestures for the first time. I think about how beautiful she is. Why won't she come in? I'm ready. I'm so eager to get to talk to her. Doesn't she know the time is precious. I want to have her all to myself.
As I stare and pray for her in my head. God beautifully reveals to me His heart.

He gently says to me, "Sweet Shelly, don't you realize...This is how I wait for you. This is how I long for you. I have gifts waiting for you, in my presence. I wait for you, watching, eager, praying for you, waiting for you to look at me, join me, dine with me." Why are you so distracted my daughter? Come inside and rest, enjoy what I have for you."

Psalm 16:11
You will show me the path of life;
In Your presence is fullness of joy;
At Your right hand are pleasures forevermore.

I will never forget that beautiful word picture He gave me as I leaned on my door post that day. I'm so grateful it was while I was watching my mom. Her beautiful image burned in my mind forever.

Psalm 73
21 Thus my heart was grieved,
And I was vexed in my mind.
22 I was so foolish and ignorant;
I was like a beast before You.
23 Nevertheless I am continually with You;
You hold me by my right hand.
24 You will guide me with Your counsel,
And afterward receive me to glory.

25 Whom have I in heaven but You?
And there is none upon earth that I desire besides You.
26 My flesh and my heart fail;
But God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.

27 For indeed, those who are far from You shall perish;
You have destroyed all those who desert You for harlotry.
28 But it is good for me to draw near to God;
I have put my trust in the Lord GOD,
That I may declare all Your works.

I cling to your promises

"Did mom get ahold of you yet?"
was the message.
My heart sank. I knew something was wrong.
I knew something was wrong. My stomach hurt.

Lord,
My mom has a brain tumor.?.
seriously?

I'm on the phone explaining every detail I know to yet, another person. It sounds heartless, cold, and medical.
But, its all I can do. Because if I really show how I'm feeling. I won't be able to function, communicate, or pick up my kids.
So, I hang up, a little sting in my eyes, and a knot in my throat.
crap.
Is it real? Does it mean its real if I allow myself to cry? What will happen if I allow my self to fully emotionally explore what these precious last few days mean.
Every day is few and precious...every day is fragile. Yet, I'm face to face with a real, tangible enemy...a tumor.
A tumor that threatens a beautiful life... a life that is intertwined with mine. She is mine...not just a life. She is MY mom. My momma.
My mom has a tumor.
See...I didn't even want to go here. I'm ready to celebrate her any day...but not like this. Not like this. This is not one of those letters I want to write to remember her every good quality. One you hear read about a distant person, whom you will soon forget. No...she will live.

Gavin just hurt his finger, numb inside, I sit on the floor and hold him while he cries. I'm staring at the floor. Rubbing his back, I'm lost in thought. What is happening? God, I'm sad and afraid to live a life without her in it. I profess that You are in control. I profess that I believe heaven is better. Do I believe it? Do I believe it now? Does she?
Yes.
Yes, my hope is still in You. Yes, my pain is real, but Your love is even more tangible right now.

I cling to your promises...
Acts 17:24-28
24 Him I proclaim to you:God, who made the world and everything in it, since He is Lord of heaven and earth, does not dwell in temples made with hands. 25 Nor is He worshiped with men’s hands, as though He needed anything, since He gives to all life, breath, and all things. 26 And He has made from one blood every nation of men to dwell on all the face of the earth, and has determined their preappointed times and the boundaries of their dwellings, 27 so that they should seek the Lord, in the hope that they might grope for Him and find Him, though He is not far from each one of us; 28 for in Him we live and move and have our being,

2 Chronicles 32:7
“Be strong and courageous; do not be afraid nor dismayed before the king of Assyria, nor before all the multitude that is with him; for there are more with us than with him. With him is an arm of flesh; but with us is the LORD our God, to help us and to fight our battles.”

Psalm 50:15
Call upon Me in the day of trouble;I will deliver you, and you shall glorify Me.”

Gavin celebrates a 5th birthday and new life!!

Gavin has stolen my heart. I think he is one pretty special kid. It is with great joy that I get to celebrate him today.
I'll tell you a special story that happened this week.
I could repeat it 100 times over and it would never get old.

It was Thursday morning, we were supposed to be at bible study but Gracie had a runny nose. I was dissapointed but honestly, enjoying the quiet morning, lounging in my jammies. The tv was off (we had had too much of it) and I was at my computer, catching up on work, while Gavin was drawing at the table. I had music on and the babies were crawling all over eachother in the kitchen, happy as can be. From the dining room Gavin asks, "Momma, where is the cross?" I asked, "Did you ask that because you heard it in the song thats playing?" He said, "Yah", pretty matter of factly. The song was still going...Lead me to the cross where your love poured out...
I explained as simply as I could that Jesus died on the real cross 2000 years ago once and for ALL but that the song was explaining a longing to go to the cross because thats where Jesus forgave our sins. I explained that if we ask Jesus into our heart then He forgives our sin. He then said, "Yah because Jesus can't live in our hearts if there is sin in it." Blown away...I said, "You're absolutely right." We smile and he goes back to coloring while I turn back to the screen. Maybe 30 seconds go by and I hear him say, "Jesus, will you come into my heart?"
I turn quickly to see him shrugging his shoulders and looking upward. He catches my gaze and says, "Did He hear me?"
I gave him a big hug and said, "Yes. He absolutely heard you and you just made His heart (and mine) SOOO happy."
He couldn't wait to tell Daddy and we celebrated that night at dinner.

What a precious gift.
God's gift of life is so simple and is so easy to receive.
We like to complicate it.
Maybe that's why Christ told His disciples in
Matthew 18:3 “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.

Joy in trial

Watch and see my dear friend & amazing athlete, share her story about how her faith has brought her joy in trial.

Watch more video of 2011 University of Washington Final Qualifier on flotrack.org

In the spring of 2008 the nation with hit with one of the best high school state meets in history as the fastest times ever were run in the boys 3200 and girls 1600. Christine Babcock ran 4:33 that day in May (splitting 4:17 for 1500). One of best prep's in history entered her freshman year at the University of Washington and she delivered with a bang. Christine was the top freshman at the 2008 NCAA XC Championships and 7th overall in the country as she led the dominant Huskies to a national title. She went on to become a finalist in the 1500 meters at the 2009 NCAA Outdoor Championships. Since then Christine has had trouble putting together stints of healthy training. Now on the road to recovery, Christine talks about her journey and what its been like to be sideline as one of the best. Her positive attitude is unlike many others out there and just a small part of what makes her such a wonderful person. All the best to Christine on her road to get back to the top!